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Red flags were a waving but now I know better!!!

AlexandraL's picture

Submitted by AlexandraL on Thu, 03/24/2011 - 10:33am

Well, I went out for a drink/date with one of my dearest friends' coworkers last night. Very nice guy, accomplished, down-to-earth, not fixated on his two daughters (ok, just two daughters set a flag waving) but soon into the convo (we're talking first ten minutes here) he tells me he was woken by a knock on his door first thing...and he is getting summoned to court by his ex wife for more CS.

I played it cool and didn't say too much -- he went on to say he has a "crazy ex wife with mental health issues".

Ok, glad I found this out straight away but are there ANY nice men without psycho, controlling ex wives and entitled children? This is so disappointing.

Running shoes are on!!!!!

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AlexandraL's picture

Submitted by AlexandraL on Thu, 03/24/2011 - 1:46pm

It's actually depressing. Seriously, all the decent men have weirdos for ex wives and I have zero threshold for BS and drama these days.

AlexandraL's picture

Submitted by AlexandraL on Thu, 03/24/2011 - 6:00pm

What I want to know is why a man is even considering dating if there is still drama/unfinished business from his first marriage? It seems very selfish and unfair. Why would you even entertain a relationship when you're still stuck back in your marriage, even if you're divorced? I mean, it can go on for years. Why would you want to make an effort to lure someone into a less than desirable situation?

Well, this guy should have been more guarded but I'd rather know now and cut my losses. I've already done it the other way...having a man not tell me the whole truth (as in they weren't even divorced yet, just separated, that BM has OCD, that there is dysfunction with BM, his mom, and SD).

It seems like most of the nice men have lunatic ex wives or are asses. Let's face it, it's the lunatic women who leave good men...and then the next woman suffers. I know it is all about trade offs but I don't think I can walk the path. A good man is not worth all the bullshit that comes along with their crazy ex wives and guilt parented kids.

I sure hope there is someone out their with their shit together...

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Thu, 03/24/2011 - 6:23pm

I have an insane XW but no BKs to deal with.

Fortunately I am married to an amazing woman and do not need to get back on the market.

I do have two friends that may work for you.

One never married. No kids, late 30's to early 40's. Degreed Engineer, securely employed, good income. In to Harley's, guns, adventure sports and occasionally sports a Mohawk. Devoted to his dog and his cat. He is a college buddy of mine.

Second one married and divorced twice mid 40's, no kids. Business degree, sales manager, securely employed, good income. In to Harley's and charitable fraternal organizations. Inactive reservist military officer. Great guy. My HS BFF.