My parents split when I was 13. Looking back, I think I may have been ahead of my years. When my mom said hurtful things about my dad, I knew the things she said came from a place of hurt and did not reflect reality. My step daughter is 10. Recently, she began the new practice of bashing her mother to me. Telling me things she has said. Sometimes hurtful. The thing is, she is a really sweet kid and I don't think she says those things to hurt me. I think her mom likes to gossip and has used gossip as a way to bond with her and I think in her own way she is trying to bond with me. I am not that girl. I don't say hurtful things about my son's biological "father" even though he deserves it. So I am aware that she and her mother talk negatively about my husband, myself and even my son. However, I am not sure how to feel or respond to it. I am sensitive. It hurts to know that she says hurtful things. I know that we all need to vent, but I think in this situation it goes beyond simple venting. If anyone has any advice on how to approach this I would be very greatful.