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"I don't care if nephew comes over as long as I don't have to do anything with him."

brutallyhonest's picture

This weekend I had one of those WTF moments with BF where I wished I had a tape recorder handy.

Background: SD17 is an only child and only grandchild. She hasn't been around much since turning 15, flunking high school, and not liking BF's consequences for her behavior. My siblings are all younger than BF and I'm the oldest sibling, so to date I only have one nephew. He is the first grandkid in my family and we do dote on him a bit. We live two towns away from Brother and SIL so I only get to see the nephew about once a month. The kid is about 15 months, and a doll, just learning to walk and a very happy kid. BF and I won't be having kids of our own, but I do like kids. Just the kind of kids you can have fun with and then return to their parents.

To the story: My brother called and asked if we would mind babysitting nephew for a few hours Saturday night while he and SIL went out to dinner in our town. I told him I would get back to him after checking with BF (important since in the beginning I sometime didn't get notified of child care changes). We had no plans for the weekend and just planning to grill something and hangout at home. BF's response to would he mind if I babysat nephew for a hours, "I don't care if nephew comes over as long as I don't have to do anything with him."

I didn't feel like starting a fight, but I really wanted to ask if he would have been ok if I'd given that response EOW when SD17 came over for YEARS??!! He used to get mad if I went into our room to read or otherwise occupy myself when SD was over. It could never appear that I was less than THRILLED to see her. Ignoring her or having something I'd rather do was grounds for a huge fight with BF after she left. Take it one step further, how would he feel if any of his siblings or parents gave that answer when asked to babysit SD for a few hours?

While nephew was at our house for 3.5 hours BF could hardly be bothered to look up from his laptop or move his butt from the couch. Nephew and I had fun planning with his car, taking a walk with the dog, and making a mess with dinner.

Have to remember that line when or if we ever see SD17 again, "she can come over as long as I don't have to do anything with her." Then I'll break out my laptop and plop my butt on the couch.

Comments

Willow2010's picture

It's called selective memory loss.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
My DH is a master at this! I thought he invented it!

Jsmom's picture

Just make a note to bring it up to him away from the situation then when SD comes over you can say I am spending as much time with her as you spent with my nephew. Fair is fair. I know it is a nephew, but I am really close with my nieces and nephews and would be irritated that he was so disinterested.