I have been dating my fiancé for two years. He has two boys from his previous marriage that are ages 7 and 8. I have a 3 year old daughter from a relationship prior to meeting my fiancé and am currently expecting another little baby at the end of August.

Since we have started dating I have had many many issues with simply trying to cope with the boys mother being in my life no matter what I do, and if I really wanted to
Be a stepmother of children who were not raised the way I would have raised them myself. My daughter has been so well behaved so far since birth. Her father was in her life but not as much as he should have been and is started to come around since I've started dating again. Needless to say my daughter is the way she is and is so well behaved because of me, and the way I raised her to be so far. My daughter was one when I started dating my fiancé, so he gets treated pretty much like he is her father, because in her eyes, he is, he is also raising her. With that being said he couldn't possibly imagine the struggles I'm having being in the lives of two little boys who are older enough to understand I'm just daddy girlfriend and I don't matter. They were raised already for the most part and are the way they are because of him and his ex wife.

Now the oldest son Ryan fakes sick when it's dinner time by "my stomach hurts" or "I'm going to throw up" but while playing with his brother he is fine, when told to eat his food once more, he goes again with the same phrases. I have told my fiancé that he has no fever, he was just eating breakfast and lunch perfectly fine, and he already pooped today. I picked up his plate(aggravated because it wasn't the first, second, or third time) and tell him to go try to throw up, if you cannot,go lay in bed until you feel better. While he always cries when someone raises their voice with them especially me, my fiancé get mad at me and tells me I'm mean he doesn't feel good and that is why he is upstairs crying, I tell him he is up crying because he was yelled at not sick and to let it play out. He of course ignores me, tells me I'm wrong and then heads to his room to baby him some more, tells him a hot bath might help and when done gives him the iPad to play and, Geesh what an amazing recovery he has until the following night at dinner time, which I left the table when it started.

This son was diagnosed with asthma within the first couple months of me dating their father. My daughter and myself also have asthma so I am well aware of what wheezing sounds like and the medicines. When I was growing up and wanted attention from my mother I used to wake up and tell her I couldn't breath and physically try to make appear as though I was having problems breathing. Now it being over a year and a half of having known asthma, he still at bedtime only comes to our room and acts like he cannot breath, but is NOT wheezing at all just appears to be taking obnoxious deep breaths, often now throughout the night and before school Monday morning. If my fiancé is out late, and I am home with the boys by myself, he is fine, not one problem with his breathing.

I had brought it up numerous time to my fiancé, he was going through emergency medicine like crazy and it is not inexpensive. Each time upon bringing it to his attention I have been shut down and out. I also told him to stop making it fun, don't give home your iPad to play with, don't let him watch tv or play on his ds while he does his treatment. Sit there with him and watch it stop. And again I'm ignored.So I talked to his bio mom(last resort). She has th mon-fri for school. I asked her how often he needs it and gets up for it at her house, she said she hasn't given it to him in over a year, that she asked my fiancé why he gets it so much here.....

This really upset me, so I figured it was either from my dogs(she doesn't have any) or he is simply faking it for attention. I got rid of my dogs and scrubbed the house clean, washed their blankets, absolutely everything and still he is doing it, and fiancé won't listen to me or take him for an allergy test.... I'm devastated I had gotten rid of my dogs for no reason, because he doesn't want to confront his son.

What am I to do? I don't want my daughter or new baby being babied like this their entire life, to be told it's okay to lie, you get rewarded, and to just constantly feel like my opinions do not matter at all? Please I need some advice.