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there is light at the end of the tunnel

dodgegal05's picture

I just got done having a great convo with df, i explained that I felt paranoid about losing us bc of the skids and their behavior at times. He actually understood. He knows that my past relationships affect how I feel about this one. Its the first healthy relationship ive had probably ever and am afraid I will lose it some how. So after we discussed the reasons why i felt all of this he actually said the right thing (rare for most men Blum 3 ) He assured me that there is nothing they (skids) can say, do, or try to do that will change his mind about our certain future. So I feel a million times better. I explained that I am trying to worry less and he understands that is just part of who I am and who he loves (mushy...sorry). While my control freak nature does bother him on occasion (somethings about him bothers me on occasion) he doesnt have a problem with any of it. I hope this doesnt rub anyone the wrong way, i just had to get this out. I want to do the happy dance, plus success stories are nice to read too. I cant say what the future will hold, but I know that we have a strong relatioship and are on the same page.

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SteppingUp's picture

I agree, good stories are really nice to read -- when so often on a site like this is just negative, negative, negative.

Kudos to you and talking it out with your DF...I know how you feel although I haven't read any of your previous posts. I'm sometimes afraid that the crap we deal with with BM and the skids will affect our relationship. It sucks to think that way but then you realize of course it has an IMPACT on your relationship, but it's just how you deal with it that makes or breaks it.

dodgegal05's picture

in the past we havent had any real huge issues with the skids. A few comments and trying to push me out of his life in the beginning of our relationship thats about it. He had some troubles standing up to them at first, gave in to the two youngest every whim. But after I explained that they are both over 18 and need to learn to rely on themselves he agreed and has been improving. Now they hardly even talk to him, usually they make idle threats about wanting to see him/coming out to see him (only when im not home, usually when he is work). They say they want to, but never do. He even called them all for easter and only one answered, the others havent even called or texted. So they dont really interfer with our lives, but it was important to get things straightened out just in case they decide to enter our lives ever :O