Modification update
Good new; bad news; eh news.
The bad news is child support was not lowered; in fact, the attorneys managed to get both FDH and his XW to take it off the table. The strategy goes something like this: once the new baby is born, FDH has to file a modification anyway and his XW doesn't know I'm pregnant. XW's attorney got XW to not fight visitation if FDH would not fight CS. So, FDH's attorney said, "Don't fight it. File for modification through GA child support recovery after the baby's born." Court is always a gamble, but the office of child support recovery in GA goes strictly by the equation. I think it probably didn't hurt the situation that XW's attorney knows someone who died from the same medical condition FDH has.
The good news is that FDH now has CO'd visitation with FSS. 91 consecutive days in the summer, every Christmas (NO clue how he managed to pull that one off), and every other weekend he's in GA (just in case he gets stationed in GA again). So. . . barring some crazy act of God or Congress, FSS should be coming home w/ FDH for summer.
The eh news is that the judge didn't rule on the house they own together because as it turns out the bank has more or less already taken care of it. The bank has found a buyer, and since they are somehow managing to sell it for more than what's owed on it, neither FDH or XW will have to pay anything. Good that FDH isn't being stuck with the debt, but also bad because it's going on his credit report as a foreclosure (if it hasn't already).
Overall, though, we're both pretty excited about the outcome. He goes back to the courthouse tomorrow to sign the paperwork. Mostly, I'm excited for FDH to be coming home soon; I always hate when he has to leave. We get enought of that in the army w/o court. He'll be home on Monday; gonna spend a few more days in GA w/ his family there; they also haven't seen FSS since Christmas '09 b/c XW is a total bit(h and hasn't allowed anyone from his side of the family access to FSS.
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He was going for CS
He was going for CS modification b/c he has been paying way too much. His CS was based on an LES (pay stub) from when he was airborne in NC. He was pulling down BAH (I'm thinking it was about $1000/mo, but don't remember exactly) and also jump pay from being airborne. When he got moved to CO, his new unit is not airborne, so he lost jump pay, and when the divorce was finalized (with him having no custody), he lost BAH. So what was originally calculated at about 25%-ish of his income suddenly jumped up to being a much larger chunk of his income. FDH had to get an "expert" witness (basically, someone else in the military who is familiar with how military pay works) to explain to the judge how he doesn't get BAH anymore b/c of not having custody or jump pay anymore b/c he's not in an airborne unit. Except, as it turns out, the judge was retired military (82d Airborne, no less) and very familiar with it. That's why XW gave in on the custody issue, if she didn't, the judge was going to re-calculate CS based on his not having those two additional incomes anymore. With FDH having more than 90 days of consecutive physical custody (ergo, in the army's eyes, a *need* to have housing other than a barracks room), the army will re-instate his BAH.
With the baby's C-sect scheduled for the 24th of this month at 7:30 (I'm SO EXCITED), it will really only be another month or two of CS being where it is.
Easy - I don't talk to her.
Easy - I don't talk to her. Ever. Period. She is blocked from mine and FDH's FB pages (she can not see mine at all and can only see a very limited amount on FDH's). She is blocked from my cell phone. It probably doesn't hurt that she's in GA and I'm in CO. I've been told she calls me horrible names and bad maouths me around her town. I don't care. I don't live there; I don't know those people; those people don't know me. I've point blank told FDH's family that I do not want to know anything she says about me or FDH and I would appreciate it if they wouldn't say anything to her about me or FDH (this extends to also not bragging/gossiping about us around town since it's a small town and all). I also pointed out to them that she and her mom are likely to use any and all interactions/conversations/rumors/etc. in court against FDH.
So far, so good. Obviously, she is *going* to find out about when CS is modified through CS recovery, but even then I have absolutely no intention of humoring her insanity. She can bit(ch to everyone in town and rant and rave all she wants on FB and make herself look like an idiot; I don't care. I only wish FDH's family would adopt my attitude towards this woman; they still allow her to bait them into petty, childish FB arguments. :?
Well, in our case, BM
Well, in our case, BM initially got full custody (actually, she got everything she asked for b/c FDH's chain of command would not give him time off to go to court; they were convinced that the SMCRA covered all legal cases) in the divorce. No one *except* FDH has even senn FSS since Christmas '09 - and he's only been able to see him twice. So, when FSS would ask about me (always "Where's Dole?"), FDH would just say, "She's at home." Basically a don't-rock-the-boat approach. Also, FSS can't really talk. He has a vocabulary or maybe 30 - 40 understandable words.