SD goes to BM's on weekends and whenever we have a special occasion or event DH asks her to have some weekend time. Sometimes they end up "trading" times and sometimes BM just gives up the time. DH of course picks and chooses very carefully how often he is asking for this time, he doesn't ask for everything that comes up... it has to be "special".

We haven't asked for any weekend time for awhile and I have out-of-town family visiting this weekend. My whole extended family is having a big gathering this Sunday. SD has not been able to attend the last several family gatherings. So this time I told DH, please try to get her this Sunday since she's missed the last several holidays, etc. He asked to pick her up about noon on Sunday.

BM's response was that he can't have her Sunday but he can have her Saturday. Her reason is that because she now works on Saturdays she doesn't get to see SD on Saturdays anymore, and Sunday is the only day she has to see her.

1. Hey moron the party is on Sunday. It doesn't help us to have her on Saturday.

2. Do I care that you have a job now and work on Saturdays? No. That's your problem.

3. Guess what, we work Monday through Friday every day and we don't get to see SD while we are at our jobs those days, and YOU get her every weekend!!! By your argument we should get her at least one weekend day every week, since we work the other days!

4. If you don't see her on Saturdays why is she even going to your house on Saturdays at all?

Then DH stupidly replied to her trying to negotiate and said he could have her back by 3:00. I told him, why did you say that? There's no way she'd be back by 3:00. He's saying he was planning to just have her there for the meal part and not the party part, and I'm like great, so you have to tell her halfway through that she has to leave and go back to her mom's (which she does not like to do anyway)... not acceptable!!

Guess what, this is another situation where if DH chose to stick it to her with the contract he could. Their contract actually says that whoever doesn't have SD on the weekends, can have her for a 6-hour period of time, upon only 8 hours notice by the other party!! I think it's a terrible clause and it doesn't matter because they don't follow the contract schedule anyway. But still he could hard line it with that.

So once again I am in the position of impatiently waiting for DH to make this happen. WHY are men so afraid to use their balls to negotiate!!!!!