So I posted a few weeks ago.  But wanted to get some more advise on what to do with my future. Brief recap have a 8 year old stepson and 14 year old bio son.  Moved in with my Boyfriend a little over a year ago.  Out of state gave up a lot to be with him.  8 year old is very difficult.  

Still wets his pants and bed on occasion even had to go to the school 3 times right before summer to bring him clothes because he had wet himself.  (he's gotten better in this area) he admits he does this either for attention or out of laziness and not wanting to stop what he's doing.   Grandma graciously watches him two nights a week she puts him in a pull up  to avoid a mess.  This annoys me but I'm just the girlfriend so I don't feel like I can say anything. Grandma babies him.  Including giving him sippy cups putting him in the shopping cart at the store..   and he's basically perfect in her eyes.   

At School he had 27 or so physical incidents last year with other students and stomping on a teacher's aides foot.  He is capable of doing work academically. But was getting bad grades do to his refusal to do work in class.  The school was even threatening to send him to a different school that was better equipped to deal with his behavior issues. His grades have improved but in my opinion this is because the teacher has given up on him. Not because his work has improved.  

He's not violent at home with us. He just spacey and very forgetful which is frustrating.....I mean forgetful like dressing himself at almost 8....and walking in front of cars.  

He has no friends...

Bio mom I've only interacted with a few times.  (dropping him off at the motel she lives at) she only has him 1 night a week.  She is a druggie and borderline pshyco. She has said SS should never be disciplined. I've been told she was a 2 night stand and got pregnant on purpose to try to collect child support. She has 2 other kids from different fathers.   So she is not all in on raising my SS in the best way.  She got pregnant on purpose. Told him she was on birth control and wasn't.  Likely got pregnant to collect child support. It back fired... My boyfriend never wanted to be a dad. He says he is doing his best but admits he has a grandpa attitude.  He says that it's a coping mechanism to deal with a difficult child. I feel bad for the kid.

I have tried to be a mother figure to SS. Voulenterring at school, taking him on outings, going to doctor and dentist appointments, IEP meetings.  I've even been trying to get him into a counselor...I think there are ADHD or other issues. His son also has said he has tried to break us up so he can go back to just him and dad.  And has "melted my brain on purpose" just because it's fun....and he's bad to get attention. 

Well this morning was kind of a last straw for me.  I woke up and  the morning started with stepping in a puddle of piss in the bathroom.courtesy of the 8 year old ..and having to clean it up.  I made breakfast...a breakfast casserole. Something I knew the 8 year old wouldn't probably like. I was right.  He took tiny bites and made faces. I told him to eat faster so we could get to school. 

Well he continued to pick and not eat. I fed him a couple bites and he was dramatic and gagged on his food. I finally had enough and told him to go to his room. There was drama with tripping over the dog.  My boyfriend lost his mind.  He yelled that I interrupted his peaceful  meal with my yelling. He didn't understand the big deal.  The 8 year old didn't like my food.... So what. He accused me of pushing my stepson down the hall.  Well lost my mind to and started crying and yelling.. Much more dramatically than I wanted.  Well my boyfriend yelled at me to leave the kitchen and stop yelling.  Like I said I lost my mind... And started telling him all the problems I see with his son and how he's not handing it well

Boyfriend  got upset that he "can't even have a meal in peace." that he wants peace in his house and I was the one causing trouble. He said we were breaking up and to get out 

I threw clothes in suitcases....my 14 year old was at school.  I realized that it would take more than what I could do before work to move.... And I had no idea where I was going.  New town and I don't have a ton support here.  I can't get an affordable available apartment for months.  

So we calmed down.... And more came to an agree to disagree... I guess we aren't broken up and I'm not moving out with my boy..... He said all he is saying is he wants peace without the constant bickering between me and his son.  Yes he blames me because I "yell more" and "cause more drama" He even said he was so mad at me overall this he felt like cheating on me to hurt me.... I told him that's not love.  He said he does love me and he wouldnt do it... But he was hurt with all the bickering and just wants peace... And was angry with me for disturbing the peace..