In the last 4 motnhs of our relationship, so many things have happened between me and my SO that I am really seriously considering leaving. So many things have come up and are happening that I decided that I don't want to sit here 10 down the line and STILL blog about my problems.

I love my SO very much. When we first met, it was all love and fresh air, as it should be.. we both put up our best behaviours at first, which is normal, but while other people learn new things about their partners, I've come to realise that he misrepresented himself completely. The kept up the act for a whole year, and the minute I fell pregnant, little things started changing.

He was very nice to my daughter, loved her played with her, and every now and then he'd even come home with a surprise for her. I told him from the outset that just because her dad is not a part of her life, I do not expect him to take on role of father in her life. He's "Uncle" to her. This was always out of concern and protection for her. We used to have a good relationship, until his son's behaviour changed from being ambivlalent towards us and ignoring us to being openly hostile. I said to him that I cannot have this situation where my daughter gets to be bullied on for the sake of beign together as one big happy family, and until his son can conduct himself as a decent member of a family, its best his son goes to his house, and not come here with its my SO's weekend to look after him.

So now this 33 year old man has decided to wage war on my BD3 who has nothing but love for him. Now he only talks to her when he points out something wrong with her behaviour. I told him there's a difference between being a child and being a problem child, its normal for kids to push boundaries. She's a stubborn kid, we've all known that, he's seen her grow up as a stubborn child, and we deal with it appropriately. Now he has zoomed in on her streaks and nit picks about every little thing she does wrong. He doesnot talk to her, and when she enters the room, he becomes instantly annoyed. Goes to the room most of the time.

So its like he selectively disengaged from my daughter because of his son, but only to the point where he shows her no affection, and criticises everything she does. I spoke to him earlier and said if you wanna disengage out of spite, then disengage completely. If you see her sticking her finger in a wall socket, leave her, because of his pettiness. You're taking out adult issues on a child who was a vicitm of abuse at the hands of yuor son.

i feel like these issues become more and more. He sulks all the time, is moody and miserable... I told him to rather go back, move back to his house, let his son live with him permanently, I think he'll be a happier person that way. (Although I know he won't - he LOVES being miserable). And when our child is born in May, he can visit alone. My house currently feels like there's a dark cloud that's over it every time my SO is there... the minute he's gone, we're able to laugh, have fun, play...