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Goblin's picture

Submitted by Goblin on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 2:30pm

Dh talked to his mom and his stepdad about his bonus. His mom is the one who decided that "the family" needed to make sure that bm had reliable transportation. The truck is actually in the company's name and bm works part time entering quotes from home so she is a part time employee. Stepdad decided that dhs bonus should buy the company truck and dh would forgo his bonus. Dh has tried and tried to talk to his parents but they won't budge. Dh used the online calculator to see if child support could be lowered but it looks like it would go up some. Now dh is afraid to say anything to bm because she might take him back to court and child support will go up if it's based off last year. So basically dh got screwed and bm won. Its effecting the way I see ss. I don't want him here and I hate the fact that he looks like bm!

Comments

bearcub25's picture

Submitted by bearcub25 on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 2:52pm

If my son and DIL ever split up, would I take the DILs side or my flesh and blood?

See I would take my DILs side bc I know what an asshole my DS can be.

I bet there is a lot more to this story than just a boy scout shirt.

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 2:56pm

Man…I bet DH really wished he would have bought the boy a pair of shoes and just went to boy scouts with his son like he originally wanted to.

He cut his nose off the spite his face and is now paying for it.

ChiefGrownup's picture

Submitted by ChiefGrownup on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 3:26pm

^^^^ This

Total setup. BM knows how to play'em. She's a Broadway baby, alright.

thisisnotmocking's picture

Submitted by thisisnotmocking on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 4:17pm

What if Mr. Goblin only has this great job in SD's company because SD knows he's a total nimrod and is basically unemployable at an above minimum wage job?

Mr. Goblin would know that and wouldn't look for a job where SD wouln't be his boss, letting him ride his coattails and getting all the perks of "my dad's the boss!"

Pharlap's picture

Submitted by Pharlap on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 3:46pm

On the other threads, some posters theorized that BM and step daddy warbucks were sleeping together. Wouldn't be shocked.

TwoOfUs's picture

Submitted by TwoOfUs on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 3:39pm

We had one of these set-ups from BM before...regarding car insurance and an incident with OSD. Went behind our backs and asked MY husband's parents for money...just saying we refused to pay...and not saying that we had simply refused to cut BM a check directly to make the whole issue go away...also not mentioning that legally it was her responsibility to insure SD or mentioning that I offered to get an attorney friend well-versed in matters like this one to look over everything for free / as a favor to me and advise us what to do.

Anyway...of course she didn't mention any of this...just that "their son" was refusing to provide for "his own daughter" She in her manic, chaotic way just wanted a big check to make the whole problem go away...and that's what DH's parents provided...without asking us or even telling us. This was a legal matter with MY DH's MINOR child...and his own parents conspired with his ex behind his back...basically buying into her "deadbeat dad" saga of woe.

Since then, they have seen the light regarding BM and her ways and have not made that same mistake again...but it put a serious strain on our relationship with them for about a year or so.

ChiefGrownup's picture

Submitted by ChiefGrownup on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 3:44pm

I can totally see it, too.

BM got her own dad to buy her a $16,000 quilting machine (after he'd also bought her a new Honda). I wonder if she mentioned to her dad she had no sewing experience let alone quilting skill? But this was supposed to be her new home-based business to support herself.

Never used the dang thing even once.

I could go on and on. Some people just know the right buttons to push on which people.

TwoOfUs's picture

Submitted by TwoOfUs on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 3:48pm

I know some doubt Goblin's story - but if it's real, this is the heart of the issue to me.

Grandparents don't have the right to make parenting decisions for minor children. They may think they do...but they are mistaken. This is what we got across to DH's parents in no uncertain terms. Seriously...how DARE they make a decision that affects DH's MINOR child without consulting him? Who do they think they are.

I think they were surprised by the ferocity of our reaction...but they have since come to understand our position.

I feel the same with this. If this story is true, Grandpa Warbucks is doing irreparable damage to the relationship between this father and son. He needs to butt out and let them figure it out as a family.

twoviewpoints's picture

Submitted by twoviewpoints on Wed, 06/28/2017 - 10:50am

I agree, HRNYC. IMO, only thing that went down was Grandpa got shamed in front of his town's peers and possible clients...he's just making sure it doesn't happen again.

Giving BM a part time job also helps her out with assuring BM's needs and household emergencies won't put a hardship on the home. She's working. She's earning extra cash. Good for her.

TwoOfUs's picture

Submitted by TwoOfUs on Thu, 06/29/2017 - 6:32am

Again...this whole story seems incredibly extreme, so I'm not sure I buy it. But, if it's true...and if I'm remembering it correctly...they are definitely stepping into a parenting role and meddling in the relationship between this dad and his son. Unfortunately for them, the kid is actually very likely to resent them for this interference later in life. Didn't they step in and reverse the one activity decision and also override some kind of punishment at one point? Don't have the time or desire to go back and read these posts but I remember at least one or two incidents where I thought: "Whoa. Back off, grandparents. Not your kid."

momjeans's picture

Submitted by momjeans on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 6:57pm

I agree with all of this, TwoOfUs.

I live this hell with my inlaws, BM, and poor, poor
COD skid. It bites.

ChiefGrownup's picture

Submitted by ChiefGrownup on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 4:00pm

Heck, I had to kick my own nephew and his girlfriend out of my house after living there for months. They got kicked out for cause, believe me.

What do I find out next? Vampira had called one of my friends and wailed on about how they were now homeless due to my cruelty and tried to hit him up for some kind of resources or other.

Thank god my friend was too savvy for her crap and politely declined. I was so embarrassed when I found out what she had done. She was a user/faker/grifter all the way. She knew how to reflect back to you what she thought you wanted to hear until she found better prey.

And thank god my nephew finally broke up with her.

I have no trouble believing there's a bm who could leverage a shirt into a truck. Have seen this kind of thing irl way too often.

101Stepmom101's picture

Submitted by 101Stepmom101 on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 3:32pm

Since the Truck belongs to the COMPANY and came out of YOUR Bonus... Make sure it gets a nice ADVERTISING WRAP with company's name and such. She won't like that at all.

robin333's picture

Submitted by robin333 on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 3:55pm

Sinking in my seat and sipping on my fermented fruit juice in my sippy cup. I promise to behave, at least a little while.

robin333's picture

Submitted by robin333 on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 4:15pm

I'm sorry Fruit. I always envision Fruityland like Disney for adults: cabana boys walking around with trays of cocktails, private rooms for massages, Valium salt licks in every room, and Fuzzy making rounds and holding court.

robin333's picture

Submitted by robin333 on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 4:24pm

I hope it's BM and Stepdad are having an affair and BM gets pregnant. Then Mr. Goblin will have a son and brother by BM.

thisisnotmocking's picture

Submitted by thisisnotmocking on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 4:25pm

And the brother will inherit the company Mr. Goblin has his eye on... with BM holding the position of power until baby brother comes of age.

twoviewpoints's picture

Submitted by twoviewpoints on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 6:26pm

Well easy come easy go...better hope your husband does right by his son or there will be no bonus next year either. .

Best be nice to that little grandson of PawPaw's. I'd hate to think to the grandparents would cut off all the perks you and your two skids get just because you decided to take all this out on their real grandson.

*shrugs* Better luck next year, I'll assume you've learned your lesson on being so petty over a single item of clothing. Hopefully the girls can still afford the cheerleading activity , it'd be a shame if in the end they end up with no activities Wink

TwoOfUs's picture

Submitted by TwoOfUs on Thu, 06/29/2017 - 6:42am

Right?

I'd never go out with a group of 3 kids and buy 2 of them a candy bar or snack or some kind of souvenir and leave the third out...but things like shoes or winter coats...should be based on who needs it at the time. It's not like they never buy the kid new shoes...it just wasn't his turn. I'm really amazed by people who think this way.

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Thu, 06/29/2017 - 6:52am

It's not just about the shoes.

I have a feeling the OP is an old poster with a new name. If that is true, then her stepdaughter has spent YEARS being pushed to the side by the OP.

Under this name, the step kid watched the OP's kids get shoes, while she(he)got nothing.
Under one of the old names, the step kid had to sit and watch the OP's kids at swim practice.
The step kid almost had to have her birthday celebration put on the back burner because her birthday was the same day that the OP's kid was performing in a play.
Then there was the picture issue. All the pieces fell into place when it was time of the OP's girls to take pictures, but things fell apart when it was the step kid's turn.

Maybe the inlaws have finally picked up on how the OP and her husband treat her kids like gold while the their grandkid is treated like a lump of coal. The shoes and scout shirt may have been the things to make the inlaws say enough.

If this is the same person, posters here warned that shit was going to hit the fan as soon as BM and/or her inlaws figured out how she was treating her SD

still learning's picture

Submitted by still learning on Tue, 06/27/2017 - 7:07pm

You couldn't pay me enough to deal w/this kind of crap from an employer/family member. Whats next? Are they going to start garnishing his wages to give BM a little extra each month? It's not worth it.

Acratopotes's picture

Submitted by Acratopotes on Wed, 06/28/2017 - 2:56am

DH did not get screwed, you and DH both assumed that the bonus will happen it did not, get over it.

BM is working part time for the company, it's a company vehicle, Dh's parents was way more clever then what both of you where.....

DH should simply start looking for another job, he's not being forced to work there, even if he earns a little bit less, in a couple of years time SF and MIL will simply sell the place, and then you and DH will be upset again cause it was promised to him, his parents can do what they want with their shop, DH is an adult and should start looking after himself and his family and stop relying on his parents. They just showed him they are not trust worthy, how long will he live like this?