I just stumbled across this forum when I googled "can we give back an adopted child" and started reading the posts that are exactly how I feel about my boyfriends nephew, but if I ever say how I feel to anyone except my Mom I get looked at like Im a devil.
My Boyfriend and I have been together for 14 years, 7 and half years ago I was woke up at 3:30 AM by some tweaker pounding on my door. My boyfriends sisters house was beeing raided(again) and she wanted me to come get her 2 year old son before CPS took him. I need to mention that at this point he was her 9th kid but all 8 of his siblings had been taken away in various states and put up for adoption, he had never even met them. Since she had a meth lab in her back yard, Yes a meth lab with a 2 year old running around, CPS had to take him. Trying to do the right thing we went and picked him up the following morning, the worst mistake of my life! We fostered him for the 15 months it took for her to never pass a drug test and have 2 more children born with drugs in their system so CPS also took them. After 15 months the state started the process of severing her parental rights.I had never bonded with "The Boy" just for the simple fact that he was not mine. He would scream and bite me everytime that we would show up to the weekly visits at CPS and his whore of a mother would not show or even call. He would blame me for leaving his mommys work as CPS called it before he got to see her even though sometimes we would up to 2 hours.When the time came to make a decision about whether we were going to keep "The Boy" I felt not exactly pressured but obligated to keep him. Since we are not legally married I could not adopt him so my boyfriend is now his adopted father. 6 years later we are in misery. This kid HORRIBLE. He is 9 and half and throws huge fits, I meen huge. Just last week he was throwing things at me screaming on top of his lungs "I hate you" He took off outside crying like, Like I dont even know what to compare it to, if you heard him you would think someone was trying to kill him. Because I asked him to fold his clean clothes. Last year I was 8 and half months pregant and he punched out my front window because I asked him to brush his teeth! I have had two children since "The Boy" came in to our life. When he was little I thought maybe these over the top fits was part of being a child, But now that I have other children to compare him to I see how much of a freak he is. We cant go anywhere as a family because of "The Boy" he has thrown huge fits in just about every public place around. We went to the park 3 weeks ago and were there for a few hours when it was time to go he threw his self down and starting crying. He is 9 and half, my daughter is 3 and didnt even get upset. I HATE this kid he is ruining our lives. Everything about him is wrong. You cant tell him what to do, He pees in closet when hes mad at us, He dosnt wipe himself after going #2 and then freaks out if he gets in trouble for it.He lies and manipulates everyone. We have to put gates up in his bedroom door so he cant get up and eat all the sweets in our house. The night before Thanksgiving he got up and took both his hands and dug out the center of all the pies for dinner the next day. i cant spend even 5 minutes in the same room with him. He dominates everything with his fits or weird behavior The little kids always end up getting ignored because it always ends up about him, either being bad or my boyfriend spending hours talking to him about his bad beahavior, He never shuts up even in school. He is in a "special" program for kids with behavior problems. But still I am getting phone calls from his teacher about him throwing things off his desk because she told him to start his daily work. And now his whore Mother is sending threatining Facebook messages that we will be sorry we stole her son, who by the way has had 4 more children that were taken away. We dont even want him but cant give him to her because my boyfriend will go to jail. I am so afraid that this terrible child is going to break up my family.I dont want him around my kids. We are stuck with a kid we dont like and does not like us. No one understand when I talk to friends or family they always get that same look and start asking questions like" did you try and spending more time with him" or "hes just a kid" thats my favorite. yes he is just a kid who thinks that he should not follow rules or ever be told no or what to do. I could go on forever. But that felt good just to get that off my chest.