It is CRYSTAL Clear that the BMW is MINE!
DH did finally show up at home with his son.
I am going to clarify something from my post last night:
Normally OSS does have good hygiene (he has discovered girls) however, he had just been at marching band practice for 4 hours in 80+ degree weather. Trust me, the child did NOT smell good last night.
All three kids and DH were ordered into the LR and I had a chat with them. Involved in this chat was the fact they are in MY home, and how much sh*t has gotten "accidentally" broken that DH and I have had to fix?
Answer: quite a bit
Pointed out off of them DESTROYED the inside of my suv and it cost their dad nearly $2k to fix the damage. How did it get broken?
Answer: we were careless and didn't take care of it
I pointed out to all of them the computers they use for homework/facebook? Mine.
The clarinet ysd plays in band? Mine (from highschool)
The alto sax yss plays in band? Mine (I bought it)
The excercise equipment in the garage that they all use? Mine
The list went on for quite awhile. And I explained to them that I think I have proven that "I" know how to share. That for years "I" have been sharing with all of them and really haven't gotten much back in return save for repair bills.
This car is MINE. Period. Dot. No. Exceptions.
That while I am happy to share with them, I am NOT willing to share the car. There are sometimes and somethings in life that people buy something for themselves and that is what it is for. My car is not a run to the store and buy groceries car (dear god aside from a single gallon of milk what could you fit in it??) It is not to pick kids up from afterschool activities/ functions.
No kids.
No pets.
No food
No drinks
One last time so all understand:
MINE!
They voiced understanding last night. I am still in possession and will remain in possession of all of the keys to it. And yes, DH did apologize for his moment of idiocy.
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Comments
SA: This was a continuation
SA:
This was a continuation of a post last night. Where an hour after I bought the vehicle DH decided despite the fact he hated it: that it would be a good car for his kids to learn to drive in.. and when I shot that down and told him I did not want the kids IN my new car considering what they did to my SUV...
Within a half hour of that he went to the store in it and took his son along for the ride. Never asked if he could use my car, just took it.
Now if we regularly swapped cars, I could understand. That man drives his POS mustang everywhere, flat refuses to get rid of it. It was a blatant in your face F you.
And he got pulled over by a cop while out in it.
Yep, I ordered them all to the living room. I was not going to allow anyone to misunderstand. Or claim ignorance. Up until yesterday when I bought the car, literally everything I own is shared. This is simply mine.
Hard boundary. Definately. But I do not feel guilty about it.
That's awesome! It drives me
That's awesome!
It drives me nuts that nothing is just mine in our house. I actually had a little fit over it on sunday. I have 5...count them 5 broken laptops because DH doesn't get "don't let the kids play on MY effin laptop" My mom bought me one for school and SS just brings it to me and says "I need the password" I took it from him and set it down and said "no you don't, you aren't going to use it. IT'S MINE!" DH said that I was being a little selfish and I said "No if he breaks this one how am I going to do my school work?" He agreed and told SS no computer. I think we deserve things that are just ours. Skids/Kids have things that are just for them why don't we deserve the same thing?
I work from home and have
I work from home and have quite a set up of multiple screens and top of the line computer that I spent thousands on to hold my database. SD16 complained to everyone that would listen that she wasn't allowed in here. Even brought it up to BM and then to the mediator and letters to DH's family. I spent over a thousand having french doors put on the room, nice furniture from my house, flat screen and painting. It is mine and no one uses it.
But, I was evil incarnate for having the rule. Hold your ground...
SS who we have custody after three years, was allowed to use my PC this weekend to work on a project that I had the software for. But, he was given rules and told to get off as soon as he was done. That is three years later and he has proven to not screw up. But, SD - hell no...
I would've done the exact
I would've done the exact same thing. I'm from Detroit. I was raised with an appreciation for vehicles that not many kids get in other parts of the country. My truck is MINE, through and through. No one asks to drive it, no one takes it from me. It's an extension of my personality and considered my personal space. If you disrespect my truck, you disrespect me and I don't take kindly to that!
Good for you for standing your ground with everyone and making damn sure they all know it!