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just.his.wife's picture

http://www.nbc-2.com/story/28013617/brutally-honest-is-it-ok-to-discipli...

Found this in todays local news... must have ten words...

Comments

ChiefGrownup's picture

Here's the key paragraph:

"Beyer remembers the time she was dating someone with an "out of control 'Jerry Springer-type' of 9-year-old" who would "kick, hit, punch and outright disrespect her father."

The first time she had to step in, she told the girl she would take her cell phone away and put it in her room.

The relationship couldn't quite weather the strain of the daughter's behavior and the discipline she felt she needed to administer, said Beyer, of West Allis, Wisconsin.

"It caused a lot of dissension between us and led to an eventual breakup because he outright refused to take responsibility for her upbringing, always stating it was her mother's fault regarding her behaviors," she added."

Dodged a bullet there, did Beyer. When it's your friend's kid in your house, it seems to go down ok. But god forbid your romantic partner's kid be asked to behave in your house. That's the end of the world.

godess-clueless's picture

I would never slap any person in the face, child or adult. If a child is acting wild in my home then I will tell the child to stop. If the parents ignore the child's behavior, I will tell them them what the child is doing and I would expect them to handle it. I know that there is always the option of just not getting together with them if their child is really too unbearable.

In public I would stop a child from doing damage to self or others by physically restraining the child to some degree. No more then standing behind the child and wrapping my arms across them.

moeilijk's picture

Guess everyone will have a different take on that one! I'm facing a similar challenge to my line in the sand at my daughter's playgroup - there's a kid who hits with a mom who talks (in my head I call her the Pointless Parent). So, no change and it's been 3 weeks that the kid has been coming. I spoke to the group leader about it and she said she's been working with the mom on it. I'm glad she told me that as I thought it was just being pretended away. But I'm only giving it another couple of visits before yanking my kid. She goes with her grandma who keeps her away from the bad kid so she's safe enough, but her grandma isn't having any fun anymore so either things change or we find something else fun for everyone to do.

I don't want to interfere with how someone chooses to raise their kid, EXCEPT when what they do/n't do puts my kid in danger - but you betcha I will act looooong before that danger becomes a life-or-death type of situation. If the other parent is there, I expect them to take swift action to correct their kid - or at least, stop them from continuing to be a problem for me or my kid. If not, I will take that action. I will handle it the way I would for my own kid - except I'll be pissed at the parent and it will show. THEN I will remove me and my kid.

I will say this, though. I do not skimp on paying compliments to parents and kids whenever I can. If I see a kid having a fit in the store and the mom just barely coping, I walk by and tell her that she's doing great and it's tough to be the mom of such strong-minded kid! If I see a kid doing something nice for another kid (sibling, friend) I mention loudly to the parent about what a nice thing that was. If I see a kid working to do something at the playground and they finally succeed, I congratulate them and encourage my kid to congratulate them as well.