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Today is the day! Will he or won't he?

justmakingthebest's picture

He should be boarding the plane in about an hour. 

DH works in a classified area so he doesn't get to bring his phone to work, not that he could get reception anyway. He emailed BM and texted SS with flight reminders and requested for them to respond letting him know that SS would be on the plane so he would know to go to the airport for pick up after work. Neither replied last night.

We went out to dinner at our favorite craft beer place (It's amazing over 90 rotating taps on location!) for dinner and our potentially last adult beverage for a month. DH said that he feels bad but it would be awesome if SS doesn't show. We talked about places to go for the long weekend if he doesn't show- Boston is top on our list. 

Of course BM won't let me know what is happening and SS has me blocked as of a few days ago- so I am not holding my breath on either of them actually letting me know he is on the plane. 

Solid parenting choice, right? Don't let the people who are going to get your kid off a plane know he is on it. As for SS, he is just as big of an s$$ as his mother for not responding to DH. I just hate them both right now. Neither is better as far as I am concerned. 

 

**UPDATE-  texted to see if he was on his plane about 10 mins before it was supposed to take off. He responded with "Yes". I sent back, "Thanks for letting me know. It would have been nice if you would have responded for Father's day or us trying to make 4th of July plans. Too late now..." 

Whatever. Now I am in a pissy mood. This sucks. 

Comments

Winterglow's picture

I would wait for his call that he'd arrived. Let him sit in the airport for a couple of hours. After all, he only had to let you know, right? 

ndc's picture

That's what I was coming on to say!  And if an extra hour or so at the airport makes him not want to come next time - sounds like a win/win!

justmakingthebest's picture

I suggested that last night too. DH shrugged. I reminded him the airport is less than 10 mins away. He won't be there long but I could be a good life lesson. Who knows what DH will do. I give up.

CastleJJ's picture

JMTB, if SS is not on the plane, and for your sake, I hope he is not, then that gives you and DH permission to be completely done. If SS wants a relationship with his father, then he can coordinate and pay for his own plane ticket and make that happen. No more wasted airfare and wondering "will he or won't he?" You guys will be rid of SS and BM and able to relieve yourself of this ongoing hell that has continued for far too long. Hugs to you!

advice.only2's picture

Here's to SS not being on that flight, here's to you and DH being able to have a nice weekend away and many many craft beers for the rest of the month.

lieutenant_dad's picture

Are you able to call the airline and ask if he got on the flight? That gives you a little control - and if he's not, time to plan a surprise long-weekend trip.

justmakingthebest's picture

I have done that in the past and I might... Just for my own sanity. It would be nice to say F-it and book a hotel for Friday-Sun! 

NotYourAverageStepMama's picture

I wouldn't follow the no drinking thing, wouldn't show up at the airport until he calls that he is there and waiting, but hopefully he just did not board the plane and you two can stop living on the edge of your seats every couple months on someone who has made it clear he does not care about having a relationship with his father

Felicity0224's picture

I'm shocked. And sorry for y'all. I would usually never call a kid an asshole, but he is one for never replying until now. I would be sorely tempted to make it the most boring visit of his life. Not as retaliation, just a natrual consequence. When you're a jerk, people don't usually want to plan fun things for you or take you anywhere. 

I wonder if BM sent him just because she knew y'all are so over it that it would actually annoy you more for him to show up? It's not like she has any reason to fear a contempt charge....

justmakingthebest's picture

Who knows. I am not going out of my way to do anything with him. When my bios come back I will do stuff so that they can have fun, but I have no desire to do anything to entertain him. DH usually counts on me to do the fun family planning stuff. I am out of it this year. No thanks. 

thinkthrice's picture

Of Kabuki Theatre?  Hopefully not. 

FinallySkidFree's picture

You shouldn't have asked if he was on the plane or not. You should have left him in the airport. As a matter of fact, you should have made plans and GONE AWAY and then had the proof that neither HE nor his MOMMA ever answered the messages of whether or not he was coming, so you assumed he WASN'T and made other plans.

 

FinallySkidFree's picture

"Thanks for letting me know. It would have been nice if you would have responded for Father's day or us trying to make 4th of July plans. Too late now..." 

You should have replied "That's too bad, I had already made plans for us to enjoy the summer without you. Oh well, see you here I guess."

justmakingthebest's picture

Bahahahaha!!! 

That would have been amazing!

bananaseedo's picture

I agree that maybe you should have avoided asking if he was coming again, you asked them repeatedly and they ignored you both.  I would have let him sit/stew at the airport several hours for his rudeness, otherwise this as* hole will never learn. He's such a douch*bag.

 

Harry's picture

So drink up.  Just make sure there no pictures,  take his phone away from him.  He not calling you. 

islandgal2021's picture

I'm agreeing with all who recommend leaving him at the airport for an extra hour and let him stew. WTF is wrong with this kid! At 16 he knows better! As for the 'no drinking'. Yeh - stuff that sideways - hell, you're gonna need a few glasses to get through his visit!