I wonder if my BD is a dreaded skid?
My BD14's biodad started an affair with his Soulmate (evidently not me, the woman he chose to marry) when I was pregnant with her and we divorced when she was an infant. He moved out of state before she was even a toddler. He visited her a couple times as a pre-schooler and then has flown her out to visit every other year or so since she was 6. He calls her once every couple months. She seems to love him, at least she used to, but really barely knows him.
Since joining Step Talk, I've had to wonder if his Soulmate dreads her week long visits the way I read other SMs do on this site, and the way I dread seeing my FSD.
When my daughter was 13 she copped a very bad attitude about school and was getting an F in algebra. Ex-H's wife, who had met my daughter about 5 times, started emailing, texting, IMing, and Facebooking my daughter about her grades. My daughter caused a big upset by unfriending the wife on Facebook. I had grounded her from the computer and TV, but she still did not bring up her grades. As punishment, ex-H and his wife took away her trip to Florida to stay with his sister/nieces and visit his parents, as well as her Biodad who would be visiting at the same time. Really he punished his parents more than anyone. Rather than take any sort of lesson out if it, my daughter was ANGRY. The last nagging text from the wife she answered with, "I love you guys and appreciate that you care, but kiss my ass". I can almost picture her SM posting a rant here on ST about her SD telling her to kiss her ass!
And even with the CS they shell out, I still can't afford any of the extra stuff my daughter wants (and even sometimes needs), so they pay for some of it. I might be the BM some SM is complaining about- mooching CS with my horrible child...
(for the record I have never said one unkind word to BD about Soulmate or let on that she was the cause of our divorce, so no PASing from this BM)
Anyway, funny to be the shoe on the other foot...
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Comments
Oh geez, no. My daugher and I
Oh geez, no. My daugher and I had it out over what she said, plus I backed up BD and SM on their decision to take away her trip. We discussed that even though she might not care for someone, she doesn't get to say things like that, not to an adult or anybody.
She's a homewrecker.When you
She's a homewrecker.When you go along with some idiot guy who feels the grass is greener then you can only expect to have a tough time later on in the relationship.I could see her complaining about the money for extras but that is IT.She has no right to complain about anything else and neither does your ex.They made their bed and had an affair in it.The only thing you can do is try to make your daughter be polite and respectful.What kind of sick bastard cheats on his wife while she's pregnant anyway??!!!