Disabled DD vs my stepkids
I don't know if I am wrong here or if dh is. Please let me know honestly. My dd is 14 and in the 7th grade. She has cerebral Palsy. She has issues with one arm and one leg. She falls often and doesn't have much use of her arm. She is delayed, sort of. She is smart and aware as you and I but struggles with spelling and math. So she isn't mentally delayed just innocent and I worry that people will take advantage of her. Both sexually and in life. Stepkids are 15 (b), 13 (b) and 11(g).
So dh and I just bought a pool, a huge above ground from rec warehouse and kids have been in it a few times and I feel they abuse my dd. When she gets on the ladder to lower herself onto the float the stepkids and their friends pull the float away as she falls to land on the float. They flip her off her float when she does get on. When they were chicken fighting sd put her hand on my dd's face and pushed her backwards!! ON. HER. FACE. I was livid. I made stepkids get out of the pool and told them not to touch my dd again and leave her alone. Dh said that the kids were just playing and he agreed that his kids need to stay away from my dd as I am over reacting and he doesn't want them to relate their unfair punishment with the relationship they have with her.
Am I over reacting?
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Comments
Well you are only giving part
Well you are only giving part of the story. You don't say if all the kids were also treating each other this way, and you also don't say if your daughter was upset or laughing.
My guess is, your daughter might just be happy to get to be a "normal" kid for once, and you are singling her out as disabled and requiring special treatment. That, of course, is assuming your daughter was laughing and enjoying the rough-housing and the jibbing.
If she was in tears because they were playing with her, then maybe you are right. But what you describe sounds like normal pool play to me.
All the kids were rough
All the kids were rough housing with each other. While it may seem that dd was apart of that I just feel that maybe they laughed harder when they pulled her float away or when they tipped her. It takes her 4 times as long to get back on the float then them. Plus sd put her hand on my dds face and pushed her back when they chicken fought. My dd always wants to be normal and doesn't realize when others are being mean or picking on her. She doesn't comprehend that unless they outright say something horrible to her and then she wants to talk to them and be their friend anyway.
You may be overreacting, but
You may be overreacting, but your heart is in the right place. If your gut tells you the SKs are up to no good, then protecting your daughter is the right thing to do.
I have to be sensitive to her
I have to be sensitive to her disabilities. How can you even suggest otherwise? Yes they all chicken fought and flipped each other but that doesn't mean they weren't more rough with my dd or laughed harder at her struggles. Just because they play with her doesn't mean they are friendly while doing it. The stepkids and their friends allowed sd to put her hand on my dds face and push her backwards while chicken fighting. She was close to the edge of the pool and could have hit her head!
easy there momma bear. if
easy there momma bear. if anyone knows about special needs, it's tommar.
throwing my 2 cents in here, i think you are being over-protective, which is not a bad thing *if* you keep yourself in check. ordering all the kids out of the pool was a bit overboard. yes you have to be vigilant, but there's no reason you couldnt have said "HEY KIDS, take it easy on the roughousing."
I would just keep an eye on
I would just keep an eye on things and make sure the other kids aren't singling her out because she's an easier target. If all of the kids are doing the same things to each other, then it's a good thing that they're not treating your dd any different.
Kids can be mean though, especially if they feel resentment for any reason (which stepkids often do towards each other). It breaks my heart to think that they could be giving her a hard time because she's disabled.
You're not wrong in feeling the way you do...no one wants their child to get hurt, but make sure these behaviors from the other kids are not done intentionally to hurt your dd before disciplining them.