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Mom2TwinsnTeens's picture

Submitted by Mom2TwinsnTeens on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:30am

How would DH go about putting his name on SD14s birth certificate?

She's most definitely his kid, but as he wasn't present at the birth he was not put on the birth certificate. He wants to get put on now because our end goal is to go to BM and say "pay CS or sign away rights to the child you've said you no longer want" so I can adopt her. DH has cancer, so we don't know how much time he has. If something happens to him before SD turns 18, I do not want her to have to return to BM.

Comments

stepmama2one's picture

Submitted by stepmama2one on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:41am

Unless he can get Bm to agree to sign an Acknowledgement of Paternity form saying they both agree that he is the father then he would need to get a D.N.A test. Then if he comes out to be the father then he can petition to the court to have his name added to the certificate.

stepmama2one's picture

Submitted by stepmama2one on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:44am

If BM agrees to sign over her rights so you can adopt her fine but if she doesnt agree then BM doesnt have to sign over her rights. A judge wont make a parent sign over there rights unless Bm is so bad that the child would be better off without her. And usually there needs to be someone else ready to step into take their place, like you have said you wanted. Unless the child is in the states care and then the state can request parents to relinquish their rights.

Mom2TwinsnTeens's picture

Submitted by Mom2TwinsnTeens on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:55am

If we tell her we'll pursue CS if she doesn't sign over, she'll sign. She doesn't want the kid, hasn't seen or called in a year. She can't afford the legal battle

aggravated1's picture

Submitted by aggravated1 on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:25am

I was lucky I guess. My ex signed over his rights so DH could adopt as soon as he found out I would forgive his CS arrears. Could you use that as leverage?

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:44am

She is her mother and if he dies, she goes to the mom. As a step we have no legal standing....

stepmama2one's picture

Submitted by stepmama2one on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:47am

Unless he can prove he is the father. If he can prove he is the father and if he has custody of the child he can leave a will saying where he wants the kids to go when he dies. Then the Bm would have to take whoever the kids go to, to court. Of course its different in every state. Ive seen it happen in my state.

RainbowsAndDaisies's picture

Submitted by RainbowsAndDaisies on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:59am

UGH. We went through that - dh thought he WAS on the birth certificate. DH had to have ss legitimized. you need an attorney to draw up the paperwork. bm will be served by a sherrif, and she will either write yes or no to whether or not your dh is the father, etc. if she doesnt contest it, kiddo will be legitimized and a new birth certificate will be made.

simifan's picture

Submitted by simifan on Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:39pm

If DH has custody, he can file for child support. He has the child, he can prove he's dad.

You cannot will a child. No matter how it's arranged. Parents have first standing - if she wants SD; she's going to get her. The only way to avoid it is for BM would need to sign her rights over for adoption.