DH's new little OBSESSION!!
When sd17 lived with us daddy and her hardly talked. Up until a few weeks ago, they only talked a few times. now all of a sudden, these past couple of weeks, he has to text her EVERYDAY!!! Its not just a few texts, it is all f***ing night. We are out at the bar having a good time and he he hs to text her. R U SERIOUS?? He can't be out having fun without having to text her. Its like its become an obsession and he can't go a single day without texting her, no matter what we are doing. He texts her from the time he gets home until he goes to bed. You can not tell me that people are seriously that obsessed with their precious kids. I am ready to blow up!! This is just too much. Why the change all of a sudden? Why the sudden obsession??
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Me, too.....have you actually
Me, too.....have you actually SEEN the texts and are sure they are going to SD?
I don't see the text itself
I don't see the text itself but with his phone it will say New message and her name...so I know its from her.
OMG this is so true "daddies
OMG this is so true
"daddies get addicted to the children gracing them with any attention at all"
Same thing is happening with
Same thing is happening with my ss, and yes I've seen the texts. It is all night when he can't be here. It is driving me nuts!!! I think my husband isn't bothered too too much sine the ss is mostly complaining about his mom which I think my husband kinda likes.
texting is a way to
texting is a way to communicate with a lot of 'outs' and very little pressure. i can see how a dad who didn't have good communication with his teen daughter (an alien creature to many dads) would grab on to texting as a shortcut to bonding rather than doing the hard work of establishing real communication. i think he's obsessed for the same reason that teens are obsessed with texting.
that said, he ought to have some self-control about when and how often. some boundaries are needed. maybe it will diminish naturally but if it doesn't, my approach would be to sit him down and explain that you are all for communication with SD and him improving his relationship w/her, but you need some boundaries and here's what they are. Good luck.
the worst part is we were out
the worst part is we were out at the bar the other night, trying to have a good time, well at least I was. And he starts texting her. i thought are you F***ING kidding me!! I was so pissed off. I am serious, its a new obsession and its pissing me off
I know from my own situation
I know from my own situation that these men love the attention...no matter how twisted it seems...the way over the top physical stuff too...like an 11 year old girl laying face down on top of her father with their arms wrapped around each other :sick: I just can't understand it..if my son was overly affectionate and texted me incessantly saying things like "Where are you, I miss you, I love you sooooooo much, What are you doing, Do you miss me?" I would be mortified...is it somehow different with daughers and fathers????????
I just don't understand it. I
I just don't understand it. I mean I understand wanting to see how your kids are doing every once in a while. But to text them every night for hours on end? Even when we are out he is texting her. It is constant. It is seriously driving me crazy. When he starts texting her, I just want to go downstairs and get away from him. Are they really THAT obsessed???
I do think you need to make
I do think you need to make sure it's his daughter and not another woman. I mean I love my dad and have a very good relationship with him but I would never ever text him all night...every night...I mean hell I'm in love with my husband and I wouldn't do that to him....
Usually when someone is that attentive it's at the start of a new relationship...I really hope you are correct and it's his daughter but .... I have my doubts...sorry...
Z
See, if he has a number
See, if he has a number programed into his phone, their name will come up when they receive a text. I will glance over and see her name but I look away because I don't want him to think I am being nosey. I have actually taken his phone when he has gone in to have a shower and it is her. Yesterday we went out to eat and she saw us and sends him a texts that says "I see you daddy". And she can never call him DAD...its awlays daddy. She sounds like my 5 year old.
wow she is really trying to
wow she is really trying to piss you off..that might be what this is all about, making you mad and showing you that she is more important to him than you are....
so ok...it's time to balance things out...he wants attention then give it to him...you can please him in ways that he will be focused on you and not her anymore
take your power back... Z
The worst part is we will be
The worst part is we will be doing something and he just picks up the phone and starts texting her. So its not even her starting it all the time. I just don't understand why he is doing it. Why does he have to text her ALL the time and all night? I don't get it.
About giving him attention, well we have 5 other kids, so we have to wait til they are all in bed. And he starts texting her way before they all go to bed. And then, by the time the kids are in bed, I am sooo pissed off I don't even want to look at him. I have never seen such an obsession. I just don't understand!! I don't want to ask him what they are always talking about because he will get all stupid. Its his kid and he can talk to her if he wants to. Then he will go on about how mental I am because I think its not normal to be texting her that much.
Wow you are truly really
Wow you are truly really busy...5 kids..wow
You know what...this is really driving you nuts so you have no choice but to let him know exactly how you feel....I would be pissed as well as this is nonsense...fine he wants to stay in touch..by all means that is great..but there is a time and a place as there is with everything in life and well he is being very rude to you.....
Thats funny. Its a good idea
Thats funny. Its a good idea
I am afraid to say anything
I am afraid to say anything because he gets so stupid over his kids and he will freak out on me telling me that its his kid and he will talk to her whenever he wants to. He has threatened divorce before because of her. She is 17 and doesn't live at home and still makes my life hell
Agreed. Have a GF text you
Agreed. Have a GF text you for awhile. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. }:)
Yes, that is absurd! * gag * I bet you are ticked off.
* gag * : that is exactly how
* gag * : that is exactly how I feel. Aside from anger and wanting to blow his dam phone up. Its weird though, because i will text my friend regarding him texting while he is doing it and it doesn't faze him that I am texting as much. Its like he is caught up in a world with just him and his precious princess. I am sure this will only get better (sarcasm) when his precious princess gives birth in about 2 months. I am so dreading this all already.
I "hear" you! STBXH was like
I "hear" you! STBXH was like this with his precious demon daughter as well. It used to make me sick.
The entire freaking WORLD revovled around his princess and her trashy mom. I do notr miss it one bit.
He would be cool with a pretend guy friend texting you all of the time? NOT NORMAL.
None of this seems normal to
None of this seems normal to me. Am I mental? Am I overreacting?? I try to discuss it with my mom and she says just don't let it bother you...REALLY??? He is doing it when we are watching tv together, he is doing it when we go out to the bar together...it is always in my face. How do I not let it bother me??
Ask him, "Who are you married
Ask him, "Who are you married to?"
ALL moms say that crap. So typical.
"You knew what you were doing, you asked for it, just let it go.."
yadda yadda yadda
When I was a teenager and
When I was a teenager and early 20's I barely spoke to my parents not because I didn't love them but because I was too busy having a life.