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I've had it - would you take this assehole on vacation?

Oldrosie's picture

Submitted by Oldrosie on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 4:56am

The asshole who stole over $1000 from us. Had everything banned including TV and phone. Decided for the last few nights to watch TV which he's not permitted to do because hes stolen money and food from the family. He's been waiting until we are asleep to watch TV. Which sounds minor but please remmeber her has taken so much from us and quite honestly TV is a previlage he does not deserve right now. 

I woke up at 2am and caught him - he lied and pretended to be asleep but then looked at the acvtivity log and could see he had then he finally admitted it. He then put his coat on a decided to try and run away ( for reason unknown) as I just went back to bed. So was up all night after that. URGH/

He causes us so much stress. 

We are supposed to be going on vacation with us tomorrow and I really don't want him to go. I'd love to leave him here with his grandparents - he causes so much upset and he's a f*cking liar - I do not want to be around him. Especially as a vacation is costing us thousands and is a special treat he does not deserve. 

I know DH will not want to leave him and I also feel like thats cruel. But where is the line and when does he learn? 

Comments

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

Submitted by Wicked stepmo. on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 5:32am

I absolutely would not take him in vacation. I didn't even consider SKs when making vacation plans this year.i am not spending my time or money on ungrateful a-holes. 

I had the best vacation I have had in 3 years!!!

shamds's picture

Submitted by shamds on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 8:24am

Make the holiday so bloody miserable, he doesn't get to go sightseeing and does chores like crazy to make up for the theft

none of my skids come on our holidays, they're so friggin miserable rude disrespectful. Who would be dumb enough to bring them on holiday?? I certainly won't be guilted into it

ESMOD's picture

Submitted by ESMOD on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 8:36am

How does his father feel about his issues?  Has he tried to get any therapy for his son.  Losing his mom at an early age could certainly contribute to issues.. not an excuse necessarily but his dad does need to manage his child.  This is not necessarily your issue to resolve.

I get that he went around a control to charge game cost but what food did he steal?  I mean.. I wouldn't consider a child eating food stealing per se..?

If his father and you don't feel that the children's behavior merits going on vacation.. the vacation likely needs to be canceled.. or, if you still want to go.  Dad will have to stay home with the kid.. it seems there is little other option if you want to go without him... 

TheAccidentalSM's picture

Submitted by TheAccidentalSM on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 8:50am

I'd normally be with you on the food but the SS in this case deliberately, in the middle of the night, stole and ate the food that was supposed to be for his siblings school lunches the next day.  The siblings had to do without.

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 8:37am

At what point DO you hold him accountable? I think this trip is a great thing to do that with personally. If my kids lied and stole they would not be going with us anywhere. I would leave them with their father. 

lieutenant_dad's picture

Submitted by lieutenant_dad on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 8:38am

Tell DH he stays home with his kid and you go on vacation with yours. It's not fair to you or them, but your DH needs to straighten out his son. Perhaps being stuck at home, alone, with DH for a week/weekend will help it sink in.

The kid needs some sort of intervention because it's not clicking in his brain that he's effing up.

TheAccidentalSM's picture

Submitted by TheAccidentalSM on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 8:51am

DH stays home with SS and the rest of you get to enjoy the vacation.  DH can use the time to get some treatment set up for his son.

Oldrosie's picture

Submitted by Oldrosie on Fri, 08/20/2021 - 10:03am

Hi all, well we went on this vacation. I'm completely miserable. Everyone else seems to be having a nice time. SS normal as ever and his dad is trying to play happy families. I play along too but am dying inside. 

I long for my old life with - uncomplicated, happy and suppprted. 

I can't cope with this situation. These SKs are so ungrateful. Nothing is ever good enough for them. We eat out and what is offered they sigh about. More.more.more.

I feel even more isolated now as DH  thinks I need to be more thick skinned, pick my battles and just generally chill out. The comments and joking about me is quite upsetting. I'm perceived as the wicked witch who says no to everything. 

Anyway home in a week I will go back to disengagement - I might try and join a gym and throw myself into a crazy training schedule which does not include them.