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With one failed pregnancy....

Onewillfullstepmom's picture

Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Fri, 09/27/2013 - 3:41am

"With one failed pregnancy"

This particular entry is not about my SD4. But I am sitting here, losing my mind and I thought that maybe someone else has been through this and can shed some light, or help me gain some perspective.

I lost a pregnancy in April and it was... well awful as you can probably imagine. Since then I have bouts of depression, but for the most part, I am better.

Anyway, my DH and I decided to start actively trying, using ovulation tests and such. So I have been really emotional the last week or so and I've had headaches almost every day, vivid dreams, and a little stomach discomfort. All things that could mean pregnancy, but also could mean I'm coming up on my period. I feel like I am going crazy, and grasping at straws trying make myself think I am pregnant so that I can right the wrong. I'm trying not to put that much stock in it, but I can't really help it. Any suggestions? I have taken tests and they are negative, but it's still too soon to tell.

How do I maintain sanity through this? And if I am not pregnant, how do I keep myself from complete disappointment?

Comments

z3girl's picture

Submitted by z3girl on Fri, 09/27/2013 - 9:09am

I'm SO sorry for what your are going through! After my failed IVF, I just wanted to dig a hole and lie in it. Before I finally got pregnant (after 4 years of infertility and tons of heartbreak) I used to assume I was never pregnant (although always taking my prenatals) and just looked ahead at trying and arranging for my infertility treatments. I think the two week waits were a little easier because I didn't let myself get my hopes up. That's just me.

I was hoping to try for a little girl (although healthy boy is just as wonderful!) but I think my infertility issues are kicking up again, and it has taken me most of this year to somewhat come to terms that I'll never have another baby again. I feel greedy, but it's still hard to deal with.

Good luck, and it WILL happen for you! Spend some fun times with girlfriends while waiting!

Sunflower1's picture

Submitted by Sunflower1 on Fri, 09/27/2013 - 9:49am

I'm sorry ((hugs)). Losing my baby was hard too, I still cry on my due date. We haven't started trying actively ( waiting till after the wedding) but I bet I'll be in the same boat. Something to remember though, many women miscarry to go on and have healthy pregnancies. Good luck and keep us updated.

Starla's picture

Submitted by Starla on Fri, 09/27/2013 - 12:43pm

I'm sorry for what you have gone through. One thing I was often told, is try your best to not think of as trying to get pregnant but to have a good time practicing. The reason being is many women have a hard time becoming pregnant when trying bc it makes the body tense up. I have heard of stories about women actually becoming pregnant once they thought they couldn't so they gave up trying.

Good luck and it will happen if its meant to be.

Onewillfullstepmom's picture

Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Fri, 09/27/2013 - 1:08pm

Thanks everyone, I am trying to stay positive, I haven't admitted to anyone else that I am trying, because I can't handle the questions and the thought not "succeeding". But it does help to know I am not alone. I will keep you all posted.

Thanks again!

Onewillfullstepmom's picture

Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Fri, 09/27/2013 - 2:18pm

Also I just want to say that I'm sorry for each of your losses and I really appreciate your sharing them with me.