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O/T-- Being a pissed off ExWife today

overworkedmom's picture

So here is the back story. When me and the douche divorced we co-owned 2 homes together (one on each coast, he was military). The home that we were residing in together was my dream home and his only goal in the divorce was to make sure I didn't get it. I walked away with out a fight, I can always get another house and it was worth it to be rid of him.

The other home is occupied by renters that cover the mortgage almost exactly. The divorce decree stated he had a "reasonable" amount of time to get refinanced and my name off of both mortgages since he wanted them both. Now, it has been 10 months since he had made any payments on either house. He lives like a squatter in one house and collects the rent on the other.

He has destroyed my perfect credit. I can't do anything. I am financially ruined at this point. He is being forced now to short sale both properties, but I can't get him to turn in paperwork. So this had been drawn out yet another 3 months longer than it should be.

Here is where I am pissed currently. I want my 1/2 of the rent he collected. If he wants to purposely destroy my credit (which he has admitted to a number of people, me and my lawyer), I want 1/2 of that $. He likes to tell everyone that he can come back from this, but I won't ever recover. Like a foreclosure would only be on my credit and not his! RETARD!!! Anyway, Of course he wont respond, but dammit, I should get that, right?? If I am 1/2 responsible for paying it I should at least get 1/2 of the "reward" he is getting for it.

Comments

overworkedmom's picture

And that is where my problem is, I don't have 2-3K AGAIN to pay for the lawyer.... This divorce has already cost me close to 8K, I just have nothing left at this point.... When I left him, I gave up retirement saving, saving account, everything. All that mattered was that me and my kids were free.

DaizyDuke's picture

I went through something similar with my Ex and it sucks. Ours was a credit card issue. Part of our divorce agreement was that he had to pay off a credit card that was in my name, (but I was able to prove through 7 years of statements that the charges were all his, so he and his lawyer did not argue and it was agreed upon that he would be responsible to pay this off). Well, it took him like 10 months to do it, so I started getting dinged on my credit every month that it wasn't being paid.... THEN on top of that, when he finally "paid it off" he apparently settled, which resulted in a charge off on my spotless credit. THEN come to find out, when you settle with a credit card company, you have to claim the difference in the amount owed vs. the amount paid as income on your taxes. Imagine my surprise when I got that little form in the mail, so then I had to go after him for the $ I lost on my taxes that year.. it was a nightmare that took about 2 years total to end. ARGH!

BUT, because the rest of my credit is (and has always been) spotless, I was able to get my credit score back up in the 700's within a year or so of the charge off. This will suck for you for a bit and I'm sure you'll want to hire a hitman, but if you keep the rest of your stuff paid and up to date you should be fine in a couple years.

P.S. DH also had to file bankruptcy about 10 years ago, pretty much due to the fact that BMs were taking him for every penny the second skids were born and he just got behind and couldn't pay his bills. His credit is now back up into the 700s as well, and he bought a brand new truck about 6 years ago, and we just purchased a home last year.

I don't know if you'll be successful going after him for 1/2 of the rent but I'd certainly go after him for not refinancing and get both homes turned over to you. Can you pursue that?

ThatGirl's picture

Think of it as the price payed for escape. I went through the exact same thing. I couldn't even get a department store card or a cell phone because of the mess he made of my credit. About all you can do is wait it out and start rebuilding little bits at a time. It took me several years, but I eventually did it Smile

3familiesIn1's picture

I paid through the nose with my XH too. He hardly worked and I was the primary financial support. All credit was joint credit. When I divorced him, we split the debt 60-40 for me. Anyway, I paid off all my joint debt closing each account as I did. XH paid nothing. When I finally got all mine done - yep - I paid his too. Why????

Why? - Well, because I weighed the options of leaving these potential cards with my name on them open and waiting for him to pay them off to close them - I was unable to close the accounts while they had a balance - 3 years and the XH hadn't paid off the 5K he was supposed to. I was soooooooooooooooooo angry. I took my first real tax return - my first real money just for me and paid them off closing them all. I let XH know that I paid them off to close the accounts. His response - oh ok, thanks.

I friggin hate that guy. He is a loser.

As much as I hated it, I would do it again. Just knowing all joint accounts were closed and not hanging out there for him to ruin me may have cost me a lot of $$ - but the weight it lifted off me was worth it.

I also refinanced the house where I lost my shirt on that too - since I divorced him at the peak of the housing market - that was stupid - that one I regret.

overworkedmom's picture

Thanks Ladies! Thankfully once these houses are done I can be done being tied to the douche except for the kids. And he is talking about moving away, so keep your fingers crossed for me!! }:)

Stepcop's picture

My dh's credit was ruined when the court ordered him to pay his ex extra money for her to make the house payment. You guessed it..large didnt pay it once, resulting in foreclosure. She picketed a very substantial amount of money while my husband was in a federal training program where he barely had phone access, and bragged on Facebook about dropping 5grand ob clothes. She already had her plan to marry shrek, and knew he had good credit, so she could screw hers! Now we have to wait to get a house, because the foreclosure is on his credit. I HATE that conniving woman. And my sd13 is learning a lot from her!

overworkedmom's picture

I wonder if I have the court order stating he is the one responsible if I can get it off my credit???