Was I in insensitive?
SD14 was in my room coming threw my accessory drawer for a scrunchie I said she could borrow. I was on the phone with a friend who couldn't make it to my shower and wanted to congratulate me on the baby. I was saying that my daughter might be an only child because I'm not sure right now if I want more than one child. My exact words where " No, She might be an only child well my only child". Maybe she didn't hear the last part or she just took it the wrong way. I didn't mean it like she is nothing to me I just meant I might not want to get pregnant again. She walked out and I overheard her in her room sobbing on the phone telling DH she is starting to feel invisible and now she knows I don't care about her. I tried to apologize but she just left saying DH said she can go to her friends house. I feel so bad. I didn't know she was listening to my conversation and I really didn't mean to hurt her feelings. I think DH and I need to sit down and talk to her later this evening and I need to apologize.
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^^^^^ AGREE
^^^^^ AGREE
She's over reacting on
She's over reacting on purpose she's going to use (or make up) whatever she can twist for attention to stir drama don't apologize she's not your kid and you shouldn't apologize if she choose to take it whatever way she did besides eavesdropping is rude.
I don't think I'd apologize
I don't think I'd apologize again either. She heard only one side of a conversation, and only part of that one side.
I would explain what you meant, with DH present. She is stirring drama and will use this as "evidence" against you at some point. But, really, she's jumping to conclusions and needs to be called on it.
I get where she could easily misinterpret what you heard, but I wouldn't fall all over myself apologizing. There is a reasonable explanation and that should be enough.
I wouldn't spend too much
I wouldn't spend too much time dwelling on this. You already tried to apologize. Done.
Do not apologize...She was
Do not apologize...She was eavesdropping and misunderstood. You explained it now let it go. At 14 she is all hormones and she is manipulating the situation....
No you were not insensitive.
No you were not insensitive. She is not your child. She is 14 and believes the world revolves around her.
You do not need to clarify or apologize. If your DH says anything, remind him she was eavesdropping and didn't hear the entire conversation.
I toldd her she took what she
I toldd her she took what she heard out of context and she needs to not easdrop on my calls. She just ignored me and walked to her room. You guys are right why doo I even bother trying to be nice. I give an inch she takes a mile and throws it back at me. Disengament is staring now.
One thing i had to learn with SD
One thing I had to learn as a stepmom, is that what you might do for a friend is different than what you should do with a step child. If a friend had overheard me on a call and overreacted, I would only apologize once. However, its always a good idea to try to set a good example for a child that may not have many good examples in their life. If you want a relationship with her, follow your instincts and sit her down with DH present when she has calmed down. Explain that you didn't mean to hurt her feelings and she that she only heard half the conversation. Tell her how you feel. If you are proud to have her as a stepdaughter, tell her that. It was a misunderstanding, and its ok to say you are sorry that her feelings were hurt. If she continues to try to make drama, have her dad talk to her about it. He can support you by saying you set a good example by coming to her to try to make things right, and she owes you the benefit of the doubt simply because you have shown you care about her for (however many years you have been with her and her dad. ) He can also shut down the drama and tell her what is acceptable and not acceptable in your home. That should be the end of it.