Dh has a childhood friend. Nice guy. Married for ten years with three daughters. Wife was/is very career driven. Met her a few times, she seemed decent. Now here is where the plot thickens...

Over the weekend friend confided in DH that he found out wife was having an affair with a coworker. He found out over a year ago. They attempted counseling. She went once and stated she would not be back as it was pointless. He had been attempting to "save" their marriage by maintaining the status quo. Wife was very big into "appearances". Their life is perfect according to Facebook.

Friend found out she was still seeing her coworker and had not broken it off as she stated. So he told her he was done. She then begins to threaten him with the standard playbook of, "I'll take you for everything!" (she makes more than him) "I'll get the kids and you will never see them again!" (classic) "I'll ruin your career!" (they work for the same company) etc. We all know the ramblings of a toxic bm.

Friend told my dh he has, despite her venom spewing, moved out and has consulted a lawyer. Friend then went on to tell dh that this woman has systematically put him through hell for 10 years. He was in charge of all housework. She wouldn't do the dishes. She would let them fester until he caved. He did the lions share of the parenting as she was too involved with friends and "other" activities. He did all the laundry. Including, and this is beyond disgusting to me, scrubbing out a grown-ass woman's underwear when she was menstruating. She would just leave them for him as laundry was "his" responsibility.

Friend has had two visitations with his daughters since leaving. Each time, he says the girls were demanding and impatient. They insisted on trips to the toy store, he couldn't afford and preceded to sulk when told no. He is convinced they are poor COD's and will come around eventually. He says he is trying to be a "good dad" and stay focused on his daughters and their needs so as to smooth the transition.

Dh told me all of this and all I could think was there are three mini-wives in the making. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree and the girls have seen what their mother could expect so they want the same.

Last night friend called and chatted with dh about how to get back into the dating world again. Dh dodged that bullet thankfully. He told friend now or maybe ever, was it the time to think about dating. No woman in her right mind would wrap herself up in your drama. Friend was perplexed by dh's response. Lol!

Dh texted me a few minutes ago to tell me friend texted him saying he was thinking of reconciling with the wife. Claiming this has all been too hard on his kids and him and he misses them and is willing to try to work it out with his cheating wife. He told dh his life was "not his" and he is willing to accept that. (Pity party, table of one). Dh told him only he knows what's right for him and had no advice to offer.

I feel sorry for this entire family, I do.