Should we even bother?
Quick recap, BM is supposed to pay half of school supplies and minimum CS (270.00/MO)for SS8 and SD15. She has never paid a dime. The past 2 years we have really tried to "encourage" her to participate positively and responsibly in the children's lives. We have asked, sent receipts, asked again, practically begged that she show just an ounce of responsibility for the kids. She tells DH he is mean and cruel when he asks for anything. We have gotten nothing! So should we even bother asking this year, sending the receipts, arguing over how much it costs to raise a kid. This is my 3rd year paying for kids supplies and it is just tiring but I still feel I am owed half the expense back from her.
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If you are going to take her
If you are going to take her to court sometime it might be useful to show a history of her refusal to help share the costs. Otherwise do what keeps you sane.
I would ask and send the
I would ask and send the receipts but there is no use in arguing with her. Even though you know you won't get anything, always put it out there and give her the chance to do the right thing. It is solely on her that she doesn't, she can't ever claim otherwise.
Believe we will send receipts
Believe we will send receipts again and asks that she contribute her half. I am sure this will be met with the usual "why are you so hateful and mean to me" garbage she spouts off.
Oh, it's insanity for sure!
Oh, it's insanity for sure! Welcome to my crazy life. I am sure most SMs can relate to the craziness in some way though!
Lighting a fire under DH butt
Lighting a fire under DH butt as we speak! He needs to call DHR and bug them until they do something.
They are trying but she is
They are trying but she is mooching off some guy right now and can't hold a job down long enough for them to get the garnishment paperwork established. Has been fired from 3 jobs in last 18 months. I believe she cleans someone's condo on the weekends last I heard. Which is most likely under the table money.
She is supposed to be paying
She is supposed to be paying an additional amount every month for the arrearages. It's almost comical to me how some folks really think they can get through life free. Never pay for anything they are supposed to? Maybe your ex and the BM here went the same "how to avoid paying for your kids" class. The skankazoid BM sure didn't have any trouble finding money for drugs though. Priorities!
We have taken her to court
We have taken her to court after she refused last year to pay her half of costs. That is when the CS got tacked on as well. We have all her text saying she will not pay. We just go to court she is told to pay and she never does. I guess because she is a BM there are no real consequences for her?
I feel like that is our only
I feel like that is our only option! Hate it for the kids but damn the woman is useless. I know they will hate me for it but I am beginning to think I may not care!
I am beginning to feel like
I am beginning to feel like this is how it will turn out here as well. She is like a cat with 9 lives. Literally, she has overdosed quite a few times and been brought back from the brink only to wreck havoc again and NEVER take any responsibility for her kids! How do these fools do it. If I had an unpaid parking ticket I would probably be buried under the jail just to set an example!
Exactly, laws are really just
Exactly, laws are really just for those of us that follow them! BM did finally get her license back after 7 years without one. I am proud for that, of course that only really benefits her and not the children.
Hate to say it but if she'd
Hate to say it but if she'd just OD and NOT come back at least you can file for SS benefits for the kids until they're 18...at least then there'd be SOME kind of CS coming in.
I once asked DH why he kept
I once asked DH why he kept taking her to the emergency room? Having her stomach pumped. Sending her to rehab. He wasn't very happy with me about it. He would tell me it's because she is the mother to his kids! UGH. What do you say?
We always email BM telling
We always email BM telling her the costs of things and inform her of what her half is; she rarely pays and spouts the same garbage about why she shouldn't have to pay for anything. In the end we don't expect her to do anything more than the bare minimum when she decides to do anything but we will have emails proving his cost of living, her refusal to help pay for anything so we can ask for specifics to be written out in the next order, and if SS ever starts crap when he's older about us never paying for anything we can show him we paid for almost everything he needed.
BM won't even use e-mail. Not
BM won't even use e-mail. Not sure why she refuses that. We pay for all of the skids things. Once in a blue moon she (her current boyfriend or her mommy) buys kids some presents. That's it. Nothing else what so ever. It just drives me bonkers that she doesn't even ask if she can help with their stuff, see if they need anything, ask about their education or how school is going. Then when she is told by the court to pay CS she refuses to do that as well. Why on earth should she have the title of mother? She birthed a kid?