I know I give this man too many chances. I do it because he does have good qualities. I just put all the bad things on here. But I don't think he understands relationships because of what he has been through.  We talked a lot about the lie and I told him he must be honest with me. He said he worries so much about my temper. I will admit that I do get angry but it is because he is is hard headed and I think that makes me raise my voice a little and get upset.  And just after this talk I now realized that all he thinks is a temper is my opinion not being his.                                                                               Examples:  You all know that SD is pretty much no contact . Yesterday was her 18th birthday . He had wished her Happy Birthday and then later he said she called to tell him that she got into a certain college (now remember this guy get so exited when his kids actually call him and he never sees what the real picture is). So he should have just stopped the conversation there. But he continues, I don't know why no one has asked me what I was going to be able to contribute. He said especially since this college is more then the other one she was considering. He said I can only do a set amount and BM should be asking me. I simply said it doesn't matter about BM once SD graduates you don't owe BM an explanation or money anymore concerning SD.  He acted all confused. I said once child support is done legally then you are done with BM for that child. That is the law. Whatever you do for SD is between you and SD and SD can figure stuff out with BM.  I did not raise my voice or come across mean in any way. He said this is why I don't like to tell you because you are getting a temper.                                                                           Then right after that he says that SS has a private batting lesson SUnday morning because the one he had while SO was  out of town was cancelled by the teacher. He said even though he hasn't seen SS for several days he wants BM to take him to see how horrible SS attitude is and how bad he is at batting because she won't believe SO . I said I don't think it matters if she sees it or not she won't take him out of it.  He said she hates SS playing baseball and if he is going to play he needs to know how to bat. He said there is so much time and money being spent on this kid to play on a better team and have these lessons he needs to learn. I said he is going on 17 can he really learn if  he doesn't already know. I said know someone who teaches and said it hey have played since T-ball and can't hit that once they are a certain age they just don't have it. He said parents insist he teach them and it is just taking money for no reason. I said it is not worth you getting mad that SS can't hit because BM will put him in whatever any way. Just let the kid play. SO said but it is costing me time and money. I said then you and BM have to get on the same page. Again he said it was my temper.                                                                     I told him I both these instances we were having a conversation and it was my opinions that he is calling my temper. I said this is not just his life and I am not just along for the ride. I said if you are telling me these things and talking about them I need to respond if it is affecting me. He put his head in his hands and was crying.                                         Yes I know maybe I should have just let him talk about the turd kids but when he is saying things that definitely aren't right I have to speak up. I don't think he understands a relationship. Even though I think he tries he may never get it.