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I feel out of place

sam's picture

Submitted by sam on Fri, 11/14/2008 - 11:56am

Tomorrow my husband and i are supposed to pick up my mil to bring her to a birthday party of one of her friends which i dont mind i love her and she is great towards me.We are also supposed to pick up sd which we will be driving probably a total of 6 hours tomorrow another weekend ruined i have just been so busy and feel worn out.My issue is when we pick up sd everytime we are around family they are always going on about how pretty she is.and how much she is grown.I resent it because my husband has had a reverse vasectomy that didny work and we have been through ivf,icsi fertility treatments for the past 4 years.I feel like total s...!!when they do that and it brings me down and i dont even want to go for that reason.I know that they mean well but it makes me think about us not being able to conceive.Should i go and suck it up?

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bellacita's picture

Submitted by bellacita on Fri, 11/14/2008 - 12:37pm

first of all, i am so sorry u have been unable to conceive so far. hopefully that will change soon for u.

i knwo its hard when the in laws fuss about the skids...i just went thru this w my DH bc they treat SD like she is so great and better than the other grandkids. their reason? just bc they dont see her much. well, favoritism isnt rite regardless of teh reason. and it makes me feel like shit that they think this child he had w another woman (an evil awful one at that) is so great. it makes me wonder if they will treat our kids, when we hopefully have them, the same.

maybe u should tell ur DH that u are just sensitive to it rite now bc of the trouble y'all have been having and could he maybe say something, like just tone it down. im sorry u are going thru this...hugs to u

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

now4teens's picture

Submitted by now4teens on Fri, 11/14/2008 - 12:44pm

I don't think they're doing it to be malicious or hurtful to you, sam. I think that's just the way extended family IS with kids, especially if they don't get to see them all the time.

Heck, my own parents fawn all over my SDs and my own boys EVERY TIME they see them- and they see them A LOT. It's goofy, really, but that's just the way they are. I usually just roll my eyes at my DH, have a glass of wime (or 3) and get through the evening as best as I can.

Family- you have to take the good with the bad!

"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis