Yes I know it's SDs birthday!!

SDs birthday was over the weekend. I didn't forget, but so many goddamn people felt the need to remind me. I sent her a gift and a card already and I have never forgotten it but I got texts from my MIL and 2 SILs the days leading up to remind me her birthday is coming. Then the day before my DH says "SDs birthday is tomorrow" and I simply said "I know" because I do know! Was he hoping I had planned a surprise or did he want to vent about how we aren't going to see her until July? Well maybe he could have said something. But the conversation ended there.

BTW only my toddler and I signed the card, the baby can't and DH told me to sign for all of us. I was the one that picked it and mailed it.

I didn't pick a fight to avoid being that stepmom that makes SD's birthday about her. I was just quietly inwardly annoyed that so many people felt the need to point it out to me that it was *gasp* her birthday. No I don't need to tell you all what gift I sent her. And no I don't need to act excited and thrilled because she is barely talking to us. She's 15 now if she doesn't want a relationship that's her choice. It's just a birthday, it's not that big of a deal for me.

I texted SD happy birthday and she acknowledged it and thanked me. That's it. We're polite to each other but not close. It's ok. The nosey in-laws can butt out and if DH is sad about not seeing her then he should have planned something other than just sending gifts.

SeeYouNever's blog
Log in or register to post comments

Comments

Sounds good to me

You've handled it perfectly correct. Good for you.

Thanks, it's been long enough

Thanks, it's been long enough I think I finally figured how to be the right kind of neutral and chop off most conflict before it happens.

Ya Know

Why does MIL and SIL's need to remind you??? Surely they would know you know because of DH. How annoying and insulting.

You are a good SM to even do this especially since your SD hasnt been that great to you.

Sd16 B/M & Sd23 Feral Forger

It gets easier with time - easier to forget their birthdays that is...

Good on you for sailing through this without conflict.

My in laws have tried to

My in laws have tried to instigate conflict, they put me on a group chat to talk about SDs birthday. SD and DH aren't in the group chat and usually they exude me from the group chats. But this one they're talking about gifts and sharing pics of SDs birthdays past. It's like they can't stand not knowing what gift I got her.

It's a backpack.

If they really wanted to know they could ask SD, maybe she's refusing to tell because she wants nothing to do with their drama either. At this point I'm not telling them out of spite.