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How many times do I need to ask DH to speak w ss13 about barging into our room?

step off already's picture

Submitted by step off already on Sun, 07/28/2013 - 11:30pm

No really. Because there must be some magical number that I'm not aware of.

As if it wasn't annoying enough already to have a 13 year old boy walk into my room whenever he feels it necessary but now that baby has arrived and us staying in the bedroom with me and DH, SS thinks he can walk into the room when we aren't even in there so he can look at the baby.

After SS spent most of the day walking in when he wanted, I asked my DH (again) "can you please also speak with SS -" I didn't even get a chance to complete the sentence because DH completed it for me "about barging into our room".

But apparently, DH didn't bother to mention anything because as I was nursing the baby before ae went to sleep, guess who wanders into my room AGAIN? No really, guess!!!!

Is this another thing that I will need to handle on my own? I've tried to step back and have DH handle the rule and boundary setting with SS.

But clearly, DH has not handled this one and I'm still trying to figure out that magic number.

Even my own children (who are all younger than SS) will wait by the open door and wait to be invited in before entering my bedroom.

... And sorry, I know I've blogged on this topic before but again, still looking for that magic number.

Comments

oldone's picture

Submitted by oldone on Sun, 07/28/2013 - 11:43pm

Yes - treat him as you would any acquaintance who walked in on you while in the bathroom. Just scream "Get the eff out of you you perv". or maybe something a little milder - but get the message across.

This is not a subject that is going to require a 3 hour conference. "GET OUT NOW" is enough.

purpledaisies's picture

Submitted by purpledaisies on Sun, 07/28/2013 - 11:44pm

You're going to have to take action. I would react like its a huge deal and he scqtef you or something or that he walked in on something he shouldn't see. LOL

Really though I do think you will have to make it clear to both of them he is not allowed in your room.,

unbelieveable's picture

Submitted by unbelieveable on Mon, 07/29/2013 - 12:48am

WHILE YOU WERE NURSING?!?!?! I'd FLIP. Clearly - you don't want a 13 year old boy entering while you're doing that - what does DH not GET about that?!?! Maybe you just need to start walking around with your boobs out and start scaring him...and then when DH throws a fit over it - you can say hey - I clearly can't do this in my room in private - so I might as well do it everywhere?

Onefootout's picture

Submitted by Onefootout on Mon, 07/29/2013 - 6:54am

It took me about 5 months to get SS to stay out of our bedroom. SO talked to him several times but SS didn't take him seriously. So finally SS barged in and we both yelled at him.

Now it seems okay.

step off already's picture

Submitted by step off already on Mon, 07/29/2013 - 10:21am

I'm pretty sure it all stems from DH ans ss's 7 years on their own. DH had no boundaries and SS could enter dh's room as he pleased.

SS thinks the same must hold true of our room now. DH thinks he needs tO make a buy deal about everything so I'm sure he's waitIng fOr the right time. I guess I'll need to step in here as well.

It just irritates me that DH doesn't get it. I don't want any children walking into my ro, even if the door is open. My kids know better a will knock if the door is closed and will stand at the door and knock of necessary if the door is open. They stand at Tudor and wait to be invited in. It's basic manners.

DH has also recently remodeled our room and I've asked him not to traipse people through our bedroom unless it's cleaned up. But does he listen? Unlm... No. He'll bring people in with the bed unmade, clothes on the floor, personal items out. And he'll stay in the room and talk to people.

Don't like that either.