None of bm's family speaks with her. Bm's sister has been the only family member in contact with ss. He looks forward to her calls and letters and she spoils him with large ($200 in gift cards) on holidays.

She lives out if state and has requested to visit during ss's bday. She has asked about 5 days.

I'm not trying to be a bitch but I don't want my own family members staying at my home for 5 days, let alone crazy bm's only supposed "sane" relative that I've never met. She is younger. I've chatted with her on the phone and on Facebook but I don't really want her staying in my home.

I've asked dh to clarify what her expectations are? Does she think she's staying with is? Will she stay in a hotel? Will she stay with other relatives? Are we supposed to entertain her?

Again. Not trying to be a butch but I don't even put my own friends and family up in my house - that is about to go under extensive remodeling, that I live in with our Five children, where I work from home, etc etc.

Help suggestions and thoughts wanted.