I hate what Christmas has become. When I was a kid, I just wanted a Barbie doll or some new sheets or bath/ body baskets or some spending cash.

DH and I are getting SD some Pops for her collection and an extension pack for Minecraft. Our gift to her last year went unused at BM's until she brought it to our house last weekend. Her birthday present was a pool party at a hotel because she doesn't need anything. My parents get cards and my 2 sisters get $50 cash or a gift card. DH and I may go out to an Xmas Eve dinner and our friends want to rent a cabin for New Years then I can kiss the holidays goodbye.

Why are you shopping for BILs kids? Let DH do it! It's his side of the family, plus they sound like aholes. You're not responsible for them.

As for the high-price tag SS lists, screw that. I'm getting SS an under $10 gift from World Market's toy section. They have a bunch of retro toys like fart in a can, spy glasses, etc.

We never did expensive gifts as a kid. Guess what? We were so happy with what we got!

You can't win: If you get an expensive gift, that sets a precendent for more expensive gifts each year. If you get something inexpensive, they'll be disappointed little sh*ts. Separate yourself from their opinions about your gift giving. And tell DH, hey, you should take SS shopping for their cousins.

I ask my son for ideas as to what he would like for Christmas. Generally they are ideas, not demands. I usually ask my brothers or sister for a recommendation on an appropriate gift for their children.

I am amazed that people send out lists to people as to what to buy. I have never seen this before.
No offense to you if this is anyone's custom, but it seems pretty distasteful to me.

When I was a kid, it appeared that we weren't even asked what we wanted. (I think a few weeks before Christmas my parents did ask in a sly way, because I generally got the toy I wanted, but I never quite figured out how that happened when I was a kid.)

What is with the lists???? If anyone asks me what BS7 wants, I just say... oh he likes books, so maybe a gift card to Barnes and Noble? or he'd be happy with some type of board game, whatever! I guess that's why he's easy? He's been taught to be grateful for what he DOES get?

I can't fathom sending my family and friends a freaking list AND one with $100.00 crap on it???

This is technically my first Christmas that everyone is asking me what to SS9. I always say I do not know. He likes board games, legos, he needs some clothes since his started getting too small grew like and inch in the last month or two. He needs new shoes as his feet are growing too. So I say gift card.

They know what team he likes so my aunt got him something related to that. Honestly I told him to write a list so that I can tell people stuff because it is like pulling teeth with him. We set a limit and that is that.

I was so happy to get an $80 dollar watch one year. That was my big gift. These days I do not know how people do it getting kids the game systems plus games plus other stuff. It has become alot. And it seems like when the kid gets a pricey gift one year the expect it every year after that. Just do not have the money.

SD8 has been asking for these hella expensive things... Video games, a keyboard, a robotic pet... I got the keyboard (I've been playing piano since I was 7, so that's a skill in my eyes) but I don't get it! I got clothes most years for Christmas and maybe one or two things I wanted that were cheaper...

DH told me last year (he did all the shopping and funding last year) he spend $800 a piece on the Skids, I about had a heart attack... Thank goodness I'm in charge of finances this year... It's still going to be a bit pricey, but they don't need everything they ask for! Plus I refuse to do more than one or two bigger things, lol

Half the fun of Christmas as a kid was getting things that you didn't expect or wouldn't have thought of yourself.

I don't care for these very specific lists.

One of the best presents I got was when I was 13 and just experimenting with cosmetics. It was a shoe box full of sample sizes of all sorts of cosmetics/face and body care things. It was so much fun to try them all out and lasted a long time. Would have never thought to ask for something like that or put it on a list.

I could see BM and your DH conferring about what they had in mind so they both were not getting the same gifts.

Ex-DIL use to send a 'don't buy GS this' list as it was what she or Santa were planning on doing for GS. That was nice because like most kids, when you ask a kid what they want they say what they want... to everybody. All the same things they want.

I always asked GS what he wanted. Didn't mean it's what he would get (LOL) but it gave me ideas. Now that he is sixteen (GS16, my oldest son's son) he gets gift cards and cash allowing him to shop for whatever he wants and have spending money for things he'd like to go do.

The other GS, GS15, belongs to my oldest daughter. He gets a small gift card. Sent in mail because , as usual, I'm being 'punished' by his horse's *ss father and not allowed to see him *rolls eyes*.

I think your skids are plenty old enough for Dad to just ask his boys what they would like. He can tell them to put a variety of items for Dad and you to chose from. Just tell the kids to put different things on Dad's list (and list Dad can share with Dad's extended family) than what they put on BM's and BM's extended family's list.

If they load up the list with over priced expensive gifts Dad can simply tell them not to count on those items and suggest they also add some more reasonable items to their list. Dad can use the list as an idea, not necessarily exactly what he will buy.

When BS was younger and the SSs were still in our lives, we decided they all had too much crap and didn't need more. SO we started doing "experience" gifts. One year we spent a three-day weekend at a local ski resort. Another year we did a weekend at an indoor water park and lodge. That kind of thing. They'll remember the experience, but never seem to remember the toys and "stuff."

I loved that toy catalog! My brother and I used to sit with it on our laps together and pretend that whatever was on the page in his lap, he gets, and vice versa... that was so much fun!

YSS, at the time 6,was planning his Christmas list for another round of gimmedat in MARCH...5 days after Christmas Parte Deux, errr I mean Easter.

I've always insisted that my kids write a letter to Santa. Even now that they're grown I ask for the Santa letter. Their lists always include things at a variety of price points. Every single one of my kids has had socks and pajamas (!) on their lists each year since they were old enough to make them themselves, but they've been known to include super expensive things as well. I guess they figure it's the season of miracles. If I'm going to buy them gifts, I might as well get them things that they want. Some years I have good ideas without any input, but other years I don't. And there have been many times when I never would have known a kid wanted a particular thing if it wasn't on the list. I do try to come up with a surprise or two, also. I do not forward those lists to others, but if I'm asked by someone for gift ideas for one of my kids, I'll pick a couple appropriate things from the list and mention them.