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Pets, I wish my ex would stop getting them

Sweet T's picture

So since we divorced almost 4 years ago, he adopted a cat with bs, gave it away a few months later. Got 2 bearded dragons, also got rid of them. Had insisted that he get our male wiener dog and had put it in the decree. The dog was never potty trained and I had him wear a diaper. About a year after the divorce he moved in with am and w/in a year put him down because of the peeing in the house. Told bs the dog had kidney issues and he didn't want to have him.have to take medicine. Within a week he had another dog. He bought two parakeets, one for bs s birthday and then another in October for him. It now also died. And there was also a third bearded dragon that they got rid of after 6 months.

Bs just got home after 4 days at exes, bathed once only changed clothes once. He started telling me about the bird and lost it.

Every time He gives these pets away or they die poor bs is devastated. I feel terrible for him, he has a soft heart.

He is having wiener dog therapy.

Comments

Maxwell09's picture

I agree with this. SS has gone through dozens of pets unfortunately. He still has our two dogs of course and “his” dog at BMs that’s made it the longest out of all the pets she’s given him. He’s been through fish, cats, turtles, etc, dogs...and he remembers them all unfortunately.

Sweet T's picture

It gets old.

Oh and I guess his dad didn't shower or put on pants till today.... brings back memories...ick.

Twix's picture

BM does the same thing with skids..... honestly it's a couple pets a year. At first skids would be upset now they seem indifferent which I think is even worse.... no regard towards an animals life or the commitment you make taking one in.

notsofast's picture

Same here. She gets 1-4 pets a year and gives up as many. SS has a complex about pets because of it.

We have our pets for their lifespan. No other way to do it, in my mind.

FrenchPeas's picture

Nimrod did the same with dogs. He likes them for about two weeks then he hates them and has to go. He only kept one. Poor lab is chained outside, ignored, and left out no matter how bad the weather is with no accommodations made. He whipped the dog with tree branches or would kick at him. I feel sorry for him and i told nimrod he treats women about the same way.

still learning's picture

exH had a small zoo in his house: a rabbit, 5 cats, 3 dogs, lizards, frogs, fish, mice, a snake...and who knows what else. He met and married a woman who's kid is allergic to dogs so he was going to take all of them and the cats except one to a kill shelter. He gave the fish, frogs and everything else to the pet store. My daughter was living w/him at the time and she lost it, these were like family to them for many years. She took all three dogs and two cats, exh took one to his new home and gave the other one away.

Anyway all the kids are pissed at him that he could just toss the pets away like that. It was very sudden and he didn't even given them an option to keep them just did what he wanted to. My daughter fled the house w/the dogs and two cats so he couldn't take them.

I thought his little petting zoo was excessive and his house did stink but the way he just threw them all away was pretty harsh and traumatic for the kids.

thinkthrice's picture

The Girhippo does the same
Hoards pets (skids, particularly SD19 and YSS15 are animal torturers) they die of neglect, abuse, run away, or are given away to a shelter due to inconvenience.

Livingoutloud's picture

BM is actually very nice to pets. She is much nicer to them than to people. DH said both him and SDs wished she treated them
the way she treated their cats: with affection and care. Nope. Didn’t happen

Sweet T's picture

I kick myself for letting him take back his dog. Bs still gets sad about that dog. When we eventually buy a house I want another dog. We can have 2 animals an miss kitty was not planned. Just a case of if we didn't take her my husband's former bil was taking her to a shelter...his new girlfriend is not a cat person. She is a sweetheart and I felt we needed to take her. We all love her and is family.

bananaseedo's picture

I hate that, BM did the same-rotated dogs. Sd never had attachment deep enough w/any of them because of it.

My boys had our Boston from kinder- until she passed last year at age 10- now we have our Weim. We're for-lifers w/our pets. They also have our old cat since they were younger even, he's 13/14 now and going strong.

secret's picture

We have a dog, a cat, a lizard, and some fish. We thought about getting some budgies but I think it would just be too much lol.

BM is "in college" (read that to mean : one class per semester... no employment... dragging out the welfare....) and used to tell ss all the time that she'll get 2 dogs and 2 cats.

She can't even take care of her own kid, I forsee her basement apartment being one giant litter box sprinkled with dog markings.

bananaseedo's picture

Sweet, do you ask your son about his grooming habits at dads, and his dads as well? Seems odd for a kid to volunteer this info. And shoot, teen boys can go a couple days between showers if really cold and not doing much. I wouldn't be too concerned w/some of the other issues you guys have w/the ex.

Can I suggest just let your sons time there be there problem and don't ask him about showers/clothing. Worry about it on your time but I can tell you this, it's not healthy emotionally for him to be asked these things-AND if he's 'volunteering' then ask yourself why. My boys are open books with me but I normally here little to nothing about their time at their dads, I don't ask and they've never felt compelled to tell me either. Something in your guys pattern is causing your son stress, and dad isn't the only part of that pattern. You've mentioned these things before. Let him know his time there is their business and he doesn't have to share. This can be a huge stress reliever for him. Unless it's imminent danger I would cut your son off he tries to offer info-it creats a huge loyalty conflict and burdens him. If you know that dad does it to-even more reason.

Sweet T's picture

I get what you are saying. I try really hard not to fall into that.

I was taking his dirty clothes out of the back pack and he told me that he had only worn one of the 4 outfits I packed. Other than that we did not discuss it. I try to stick to the positive like hey how was your weekend? Stuff like that. My only response was well put these clean clothes away.

The kid is kind of a pita about showering, in the winter I only have him shower every other day. He argues about having to shower and then is in it forever. I asked him when he showered last to see if I needed him to do it last night or not.

The only thing upsetting him was the dead bird. Thankgoodess it was not his bird.

It is annoying that his dad can't even have him bathe eod and brush his teeth. I do not want my kid to be one of those stinky kids that the sm's on here talk about.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

BM malnourished SD9's dog's puppies... Enough they lost their tails, then sold them at four weeks old and informed SD9 that her dog "ate the puppies." BM wasn't even supposed to have the dog, but insisted. They went and got her back and she's with us now, BTW, the most loving creature ever. FIL has one of her puppies (from the latest litter, MIL was supposed to be getting her fixed because she wanted to keep her, she didn't... And changed her mind on keeping her... So I'm getting her fixed in a few weeks and up to date on shots) and she still babies her, even though she's almost a year old at this point.

Gotta love the responsibility some people have with animals... After she got her cat hit by a car (one of like 30) she called DH and tried to tell him she needed our husky (that wasn't even ever hers) so the girls could have a pet there... NOPE. However that dog has been missing for a bit... I still blame her... But I can't prove it... Ugh.