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Why have a decree

Sweet T's picture

In the words of my ex husband... I do not consult a piece of paper to make my decisions.

Today he offered my the opportunity to choose whether I wanted to drop off or pick up or son on Christmas eve ( decree says who ever is getting child does the picking up ). When I said I would stick with picking up he said I could not get son until the end tI me stated but that he would be picking up before time stated. I reminded him of what was stated in the decree but that would be okay and that was his response.

The irony is I know he knows what it said because I had sent it in a snip it when thanksgiving came up and he demanded those same hours for that holiday.

I want so badly to say, we have a decree so we do not have to fight and I do not have to deal with your reinterpretation of everything.

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Sweet T's picture

No kidding, I want so badly to reply with.. we have a decree so that we don't need to negotiate or argue. Instead I replied with "that is your choice, let me know if you change your mind. I will send a change of dress clothes with for Christmas eve services.

I could have let it go but I am tired of being bullied by him.

hereiam's picture

BM over here referred to the decree only when it suited her and to make DH's life hell. For example, "It says six o'clock, why are you bringing her back at 5 minutes 'til six?". I mean, really? She made her daughter feel like crap for being home 5 minutes early.

He's always preferred to be early, rather than late, but she would bitch about 5 minutes. It got to the point that DH & SD would wait on the corner if he was early. We never had to badmouth BM, she showed SD her psycho colors all on her own.

But when it came to DH's holidays? What decree? It might as well have been invisible ink on toilet paper.

WalkOnBy's picture

Yep - Medusa always told DH that the court order was "just a suggestion." She learned the hard way that it wasn't when she lost custody of her children for interfering with their relationship with their father.

Narcs and BPDs NEVER think any rule or law applies to them.

hereiam's picture

BM thought marriage vows were "just a suggestion", especially the "forsake all others" part. She did lots of stuff with all the others!

Sweet T's picture

The Irony is our decree was something he agreed to not something forced upon him by a judge. Ever since it was issued he has thought he could renegotiate constantly. For the first 6 months he wanted to just drop by and visit when he felt like it.... oh and my favorite bring over his dirty laundry and wash it at my house.

Sweet T's picture

You think that is funny, he thought he could date me and other women to, BUT he could not afford to pay for the dates with me I would have to.

I am an attractive woman with a good job, please tell me WHY I would do that with a nut bag that abused me??????

WalkOnBy's picture

Oh. My. Dog.

He's a douche of epic proportions. He is the biggest douche, a really great douche, believe me Blum 3

Sweet T's picture

The things he comes up with never fail to astound me.

Today he is emailing me all nice stating that because we are expecting snow today he will not be picking up BS until tomorrow, BUT his office is closing at noon today. He over shares and always tells me that BS's safety is his number one concern.