It's so pathetic that this BM has to stoop so low. If the kids are with their father why does she feel the need to call and see how the kids are doing. They are safe and in good hands but to people like her its all about control. I'm glad he has put his foot down and yes NO ONE should dictate what the heck goes on in their own home. Unless its an emergency and she's dying in a ditch somewhere I wouldn't call her back or respond to any text messages. You can't entertain people like that, you only fuel them to do it more.

Good for you guys and prayers up that he lands a job soon.

Yeah, these BMs are all the same with this bullcrap, but the courts almost never side with them regarding overriding Dad's rules at his house, and to date I have never heard a case where the court tried to legislate that a parent must answer every single call from the other parent.  If that happened, it would be a hill to die on for us, we'd rather go to jail.  Even the death penalty would be preferable.

DH shouldn't have given her the courtesy of a response.  Any kind of threat she sends is technically harassment.  Either she takes him to court or she doesn't, she doesn't need to inform him.

What happened to her wanting to use OFW?  I think it would be a good way communicate AND have a record of it.

Your DH needs to simply tell her "my house, my rules, I will let the kids call you whenever they want... all they have to do is ask me or Tankh to use the phone.  This is MY visitation time and I don't constantly interrupt the kids when they are with you and I expect you to give me the same courtesy.  I am not preventing them from contacting you and you may contact me via OFW if there is an emergency that the kids need to be contacted for during my visitation... otherwise I expect to run my household without your interference.  This is not open for discussion."

Good grief! Please put this crazy BM cow back in her box, by establishing boundaries. You and DH have every right to set the rules regarding phones in your own home. She is using this as an excuse because she thinks she can control your household. What a crackpot!

(Good luck to your DH. Hope the interview goes well and that he is employed soon.)

Good luck to your husband on his job interview.  And of course, good luck containing the crazy.

Proud as heck that your DH stood up for your household!!! BM shouldn't EVER be allowed to make rules at your house!!!

Good luck to your DH on his interview! I'm sure he'll crush it!

Best of luck to your DH with the job!!

the skids will have their cell phone in OUR house at all times
Oh, their phones will be in YOUR house. Doesn't mean they will be on or that they skids have 100% access to them...
DH's house: DH's rules. BM can suck it.

Been there, done that.  All stepkids are now in their twenties, but when they were younger (ages 4 to 18), BM gave them cell phones.  BM was very intrusive and was calling, texting and Skyping every day, at all sorts of hours, day and night.  She would regularly call them after midnight on school nights and talk for hours and text them while they were in school.  All this was about PASing the kids and making them feel guilty for being at our house.  DH had 50/50 custody, so you can imagine how disruptive BM behavior was to our life.  So if you can, shut this nonsense down ASAP!

I would just not allow their phones in the house at all. If something happens to them or they break, it’s on you. Your DH should just state that she can call them on his phone during the designated times.

I'd also like to comment on the hours of contact. It is very broad. DH's CO specifies 7-7:30pm. I think that is much more reasonable and predictable as to when skids may be contacted by BM.

 cells inside your home. I highly highly doubt dh is ordered to permit BM's cells inside your home.

BM has NO NO NO Jurisdiction in your home. She can not tell him what to do with his time either.  BM has no rights what so ever to demand a cell phone OR a pink elephant to be inside your home. DH must however provide some means for the chillllldreeeennn to talk to mom. It can be his cell or a land line.  IF HER CELLS  are not in a court order do not fret. Tell her to keep them at her house AND dh will have the kids call her unless she doesn't want them to. It's up to her.

Announce to BM that her cells will NOT be welcome in your home. Stop exchanging bags if you have not already...school bags have a quick look thru and put them back in your car for the weekend. The kids should be walking from point BM to point DH with the clothing on their back period. Thats it. YOUR home should have ample clothing, toys for the kids. Of course you let them bring favorite stuff animal or blanket, binky.

IF I were in your shoes...I would call your local telephone company and ask what the cost for land line is. Run to Walmart but a cheap phone and plug it in.  Ours cost 40bucks a month and is worth every penny...I would NOT suggest an activating an answering machine.

Always follow the order---if mom calls during ordered times LET her talk with the kids. IF your busy try to call MOM back when your not busy. "The kids limited time with me will not be spent with them being nervous about IF they will miss your call. Visitation is for the kids and I PERIOD. Courts know this.

He should also tell her on the phone:

STOP TEXTING ME your texts are unwanted, they are unreasonable and they are not emergent. I have stopped all incoming texts from you. IF you need to contact me please call our land line and I will get back to you when I am free. (OR DH can buy a pay as you go trac phone NO texting ability and give her that number) IN the unlikely event one of our children is ill OR going to the hospital and you can not reach me. PLEASE have the attending er doc or his staff call my parents with the hospital name. OH SNAP---by pass crazy by having the doc or nurse call.

What do you all think we did before this cell phone mess for the past almost 20 years? There are many people I know that even today  have cells and keep the numbers private from ex's. We have a cells and land line. LAND line for all business and cell for fun and MY family and MY friends

"Mrs. GoodLuck, do you want to add your cell phone number as a secondary number"....no I don't. Stop giving out your cell numbers so freely. Gosh I never get stupid calls from anyone. Because they dont have my cell ...It's wonderful actually.

WE control our home, we control our lives. 

You can too by hitting the reset button. 

One more thing--it has been known that some parents turn on tracking devices on their kids phones and they creep on their ex's locations when the kids are at visitation.  Come on now, you have a right to privacy.

Follow the order and make sure there is a telephone number given to BM so she can call the kids per the court order.

Tell her dh will not accept her texts anymore ...block. OK to block because you have now just given her a way to reach you IN an emergency without text capability.

A bm never answered her phone so her ex could talk to the kids. The solution was SHE said she would get an answering machine. Time when by and NO answering machine and talking to the kids was nearly impossible. Turns out in court this was brought up, right in front of a Judge. 'Why dont you have an answering machine so dad can leave messages for the kids".

"because it works for us" she said--------------------The Judge didnt say a single word and the mom was never ordered to provide dad a way to leave a message for his kids.

Cellphones are part of Teens body’s  An exter part of the hand.   Your SK are going to be upset if you take there phone away. They feel it’s a right they have.  To be connected at all times.  It may not be BM. As it could be the SK themselves complaining they don’t have there phone at your home. 

You have to think of the Kid part,  they may not want to come over and be with out there phone