When BMs little tricks don't work ..
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BM has historically tried to prevent DH from attending doctor's appointments for the skids by sending very late notice, or changing them last minute (when she suspects he's attending).
Tried it again today. She sent an email last night saying, "Just got off the phone with the DR office and girls have an appt tomorrow at noon for their annual pulmonology exam".
First of all, because of her military insurance, it is IMPOSSIBLE to get non-emergency appointments with specialists that fast. So we know that's a lie.
But it's cool. DH is off work today. Let's just say she has spent the ENTIRE doctor appt so far pouting and fuming because DH showed up (unannounced - he did not reply to her email).
Do you have similar stories?
Why don't the doctors have
Why don't the doctors have your DH's phone number along with a note that he is to be notified of any and all appointments regarding his children? See if he can get them to agree to that.
He's tried. They don't. The
He's tried. They don't. The ONE doctor he was able to get to do that no longer sees the kids. According to BM there was a problem with him and the insurance and he was no longer covered by her plan.
The truth is most doctor's keep one number on file for whoever made the appointment and that's the one they call for reminders, etc. They generally don't want to be involved with custody drama and are under no legal obligation to do anything more than they currently do.
He doesn't really play the
He doesn't really play the game .. this appointment is just the one that really matters. He hasn't been able to go in the past due to her antics and while he can get the summary from the doc, the docs don't normally change their treatment plans after the fact.
It's the treatment plans he doesn't like. Lots of meds for kids so young .. just doesn't seem right when neither of them has ever even had an asthma attack ...
It's not really that big of a
It's not really that big of a deal, to be honest. This pulmonology appointment happens 1x a year and it's the only one he's really interested in. This is where the endless prescriptions start ..
BM has been sent several letters about the medical appointments. She knows it's against the rules. She's had judges, mediators, and parenting coordinators all tell her to knock it off. Doesn't matter.
Costs us money too. And it
Costs us money too. And it honestly doesn't make that much of a difference in the end. It's not like BM hasn't been told to stop this ..
I don't get this. Why would
I don't get this. Why would any parent jump in on doctors appointments. They are divorced. Seems like it would make it uncomfortable for the doc and the kids. Why make going to the doc any more stressful for the kids?? If you want information call the doc yourself for the information but don't jump in on the appointment. This site is all for separate parent teacher conferences so dads can get info, the doctor appointments are no different.
As most of is step-moms and bio-moms have figured out, DH didn't go to the appointment when he was married to BM, doesn't attend most of joint bio's doctor appointments. But when it involves BM everyone is all for jumping on it.
Sorry, the appointment isn't for DH, it is for the kids. If he has joint legal he can call after the appointment and get the information. Make life easier for yourself, him and the kids.
He does not attend every
He does not attend every appointment. Doesn't even try to, normally.
The pulmonology appointment is the exception. BM cannot seem to keep them in routine care with one specialist. It changes every year. And every year, these seemingly healthy kids walk out with MORE prescriptions. To the point that SD8 is currently taking 4 DAILY meds.
BM is incentivized to keep them in whats called the "Exceptional Family Member" program. It is this program that prevents her from being stationed overseas (she is active duty military). Without diagnosed asthma, she has nothing to prevent this from happening. If she gets stationed overseas, primary custody automatically reverts to DH based on their custody order.
So, you see, BM schedules these appointments, exaggerates he facts and bullies the doctors into signing off on this program. DH has tried to contact every single doctor and discuss his concerns. The doctors have done nothing; made no changes.
So he made it to this one, and it finally paid off! The doctor agreed with him. Skids are on lowest dose of ONE inhaler for the duration of the cold/flu season only. Then nothing. He flat out said he sees no reason to continue the medications for kids who have no asthma symptoms, but on BM's insistence doesn't see what a few more months of low dose will hurt. He is NOT signing the EFM program paperwork, and he is not refilling any other scripts.