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trying to ruin our summer

tiger1's picture

Submitted by tiger1 on Wed, 07/07/2010 - 4:20pm

Every year we go camping to the same place for a week. This is our 5th year going. It has been one year since my stepdaughter has been with us. She refuses to come because I am so mean to her. So she says. I am mean in that I will not put up with a child telling me what she is and isn't going to do. She tells me that her mother and grandparents told her that she doesn't have to mind me and that they are right. Then again, they tell my husband all the time that if he really loved his daughter, he would divorce me. Anyway, it is time to go camping and once again my husband asked her to go. She refused to go if I went. So he says, "Well, okay then baby, maybe me and you can go spend the day together before we go then." Uggggg! Of course, then he will be in a ill mood the whole time!

Comments

koley85's picture

Submitted by koley85 on Wed, 07/07/2010 - 4:23pm

Enough of all these grandparents interfering with your relationship. FH and I have come to an agreement that our house is OUR house. My rules count, too, and if anyone wants to used their time with SD to undermine my authority, SD doesn't need to be visiting them. If they love her, they will respect me.

tiger1's picture

Submitted by tiger1 on Wed, 07/07/2010 - 4:41pm

So true. My husband feels so threatened by his parents. For one, we are paying them back for a loan so they think they can control us, even though the payments are being made. That is one reason he won't say anything to them or his daughter. SD just tells him that if he tries to make her come here, she will just get her mom to go back to the judge. She is only 16 and so minipulative! It just pisses me off because he just lets all of them run all over them. He is so depressed. His parents answer is that if he would just get rid of me then all of his problems would be over. The thing is the only thing that they don't like about me is that I am a social drinker and his first wife doesn't drink and neither do they. They hate anyone who has ever had one drink in their life and refuse to have anything with them. They are very secluded from their family for this reason. Just so frustrating. My husband and SD even went to counseling but SD refused to go back after she showed the counselor pics of the two of us with an alcoholic beverage in our hand at a ballgame. The counselor asked her if she had ever seen either one of us drunk and she said no. The counselor then replied that we are grown-ups and as long as it didn't affect her, he didn't see anything wrong with it and it didn't sound like to him that we were abusing alcohol. She has tried everything with her mom's and Gparents directions of course. Just wish my husband would see through all of this.

herewegoagain's picture

Submitted by herewegoagain on Wed, 07/07/2010 - 5:07pm

It truly amazes me that what goes on in the NCP household is scrutinized by all, but not in the CP house...

Most Evil's picture

Submitted by Most Evil on Wed, 07/07/2010 - 5:22pm

Oh well! I bet you will have a much better time without anyone who doesn't want to be there, that is what I have found in the same situation.

My SD, niece and her friend were very judgmental to me over several teen summers because I was drinking wine coolers? but oh well that passed and did not affect me or DH at all.

It would be one thing if you were falling down drunk (like our BM gets, DUIs, etc.), but you are an adult and can drink responsibly without any kids or parents' permission, or approval! I hope your DH realizes this soon and they are likely the reason you guys even want a drink in the first place!

Good luck honey

tiger1's picture

Submitted by tiger1 on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 9:56am

Thanks guys! I love this site! Being able to vent and hear from people who know what I am going through is wonderful! Makes me feel alot better!