BM takes Credit
DH and I have SS7 full time so BM pays child support. BM is at the state minimum for a monthly child support payment and still won't pay that. BM has paid CS 3 out of 8 months this year. STILL BM tells ss7 she has to give DH "all her money" to pay for the nice things ss7 gets. Dh and I bought a house because we worked for it and continue to do so. We pay for all expenses yet BM takes credit for bday gifts, school supplies, clothes shopping trips, ECT. BM's CS payment would pay for 1 week of daycare and 1 tutoring session...once again she RARELY pays.
It bothers me that Ss7 thinks his mom gives us the money to care for him...when she sits on her lazy ass!!!
Trying to take the high road by not discussing adult problems with a child. Ss7 is being manipulated.
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I am more in agreement with
I am more in agreement with you in this comment than with the previous one. I think ss7 deserves to keep his innocence and not be burdened with so much detail of adult problems. An important part of a parent's job is to prepare their child for the next step of life...not to bring them down!
What is PAS'd kid mean? And I
What is PAS'd kid mean? And I don't usually have problems with ss7 anymore... Just his mom. You said parental alienation too which I'm not understanding where you are coming from with that
Now I'm not a saint...just
Now I'm not a saint...just saying I don't think it's right to manipulate ss7's feelings like his mother does. I've been through a few situations like this with DH in court, and BM just denies, denies, denies. There is no way to prove what she I doing
Considering counseling for SS7 every 2 weeks. I have found several in my area that accepts DH's insurance.
This isn't direct since the
This isn't direct since the kid is 7, but I don't think there is anything wrong with saying "that's why your dad and I work so hard is to be able to get xyz (clothes, birthday gifts). That doesn't call BM out, but it presents the truth and I would get tired quickly of BM taking credit for things you and your DH purchase for SS.
Keep track on an Excel sheet
Keep track on an Excel sheet how much she contributes to your SS's life, and how much you and DH do. Then, when SS hits majority, give it to him. My SD was convinced that her mommy really cared. I sold off jewelry that was MINE before I married DH to pay the medical bills when SD went nuts and ended up in mental facilities.
When she went to visit Mommie Dearest, and was thrown out like trash on the street, in a town she'd never been in with NO cash and nothing else other than our phone number, she found out who gave a shit. I was making arrangements to bring her back home. Of course Coach Bags and Tiffany jewelry weigh heavier than that shit.
I hope your years with your SS are better than mine were.
This is what I would do, I
This is what I would do, I would take him with you to the bank one day and on the way have this conversation, "son you know that when you grow up college will be very expensive, so I think it is a good idea to start a college savings account for you now so that when you are older you can go to whatever school you want to. You already know that your mom sends your dad money for your expenses, so we talked about it and we decided it would be a great idea to use that money to save for your education. Since dad and I work, we are able to pay for all of our living expenses we will set that money aside in your private account and no one will touch it until you are graduated from high school. Open him an account, then every time a check does come make a big deal about how awesome it is to have this money to deposit in his savings account. Then when he grows up he will know exactly how much is mom contributed to him.