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Paul McCartney....6 Flags. (aka, why I will end up killing myself)

emptyrisksagain's picture

This blog is not intended for anyone extremely HAPPY with their own DH/BF and skids and home life. I am not that fortunate. And I'll be DAMNED if I end up having to defend myself here like I do IN MY OWN HOME. My tone will not be "full of unicorns and sparkles" in this or any post. So sorry to interrupt your idea of what I should say. Biggrin

I wish I could ever blog during the day. But then "they'd" see. And I am not allowed that kind of freedom.

DH decided to spend the money ($400 PLUS) to take effing SD16 (almost 17) to see SIR PAUL in Dallas. I said, "Wtf? You spent what?!"
He said, "No worries; it's an early b-day gift."

UH, when the hell do we spend that on my sons? EVER? Whatever. Instead I say nothing about that. It's easier this way.

So a month later he decides that I, both my biosons, his dad (who's visiting) and he and SD16 will go to Dallas as well, so we can go to 6 Flags. WOOT!

My oldest bioson isn't interested. He hates heights, spinning, sounds of roller coasters, etc. LOL. So yeah...6 flags sounded UNCOOL to him, to say the least. Well to heck with it, right? I asked my mom to go in his place. She was STOKED!

(PS, I'd miss my oldest...yes even for one night away. But I wasn't going to make a 17 year old run from his UT coarses to hang with some old red-headed witch..aka ME)

So we get a suite across from the venue. It's nice. Good pool. Yaddad yadda.
DH takes SD16 to see Sir Paul. Of course SD16 acts obnoxiously before and after. Go figure. I am patient with this because I am can see this being exciting.

THEN...the next day...THERE WAS 6 FLAGS.

From beginning to end it was nothing but SD16 tears, jeers, fights, arguments, accusations, more tears, fit-throwing, pouting, and FREAK OUT MOMENTS that would not end.

Wanna know why she was freaking? First she would want to get on rides but them didn't because they were scary. Then she was upset because she thought we would think she was "lame" for not getting on rides she didn't like....we, of course were OK with her not loving every ride....SHIT I DON'T LOVE EVER RIDE. I am scared of a friggin' ferris whell. WTF do I know, right?

But then she'd cry to get on a ride that she spent FREAKIN' 20 minutes screaming about that terrified her...no lie. We'd say, "Then don't get on this one, hon."
She'd cry out, loudly, "But I HAVE TO!!!!!!!!!!!!"

This was 8 out of ten rides. SHE IS 16!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I start getting tired of this shit. All day long it was memories of Sir Paul then SCREAMING over rides she didn't want to ride but "had" to ride because someone would think she was a "wussy" Even though NONE of us thoughts she was a wussy.

OK. OK. OK.

So we got to the last ride. Some green and yellow roller coaster that has 2 loops. Husbby swears I rode it and loved it years before. G*d knows, he's probably trickign me but who cares. I knew I wouldn't die (knock wood, lol).

SD16 says, "I wanna get on it, but I caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
*immediate tears*
I say, "Then don't get on it."
She hisses, "But I want to!!!!!"
I say, "OK. Then get on it."
She chides, "I can if I want."
I say, "Um, yeah. You can. You are welcome to. Just stop this crying crap before my head explodes."
She freaks out. "I only cried twice today!!!!!!!!"
I say, "OOOOOOOOK." (I actually don't care at this point)

DH then pulls her aside, LIKE HE HAS EVERY RIDE THAT DAY, for YET ANOTHER 15 MINUTES CONVERSATION, letting her know YET AGAIN that she has a choice and is not powerless.

Except this isn't 15 minutes. This one goes on for 23 minutes. Yeah, people! I timed it. I am THAT kind of bitch.

I walk up after 23 minutes, put my arm between he and her, and say to DH, "Let's go do this."
I then turn to her and say, "I'll tell you what. After me and my mom and dad ride this, you can see if you want to ride it. I know dad will ride it again with you."
(Dad nods that yes, he will ride it again)

She instantly slides to the ground and begins to SCREAM, everyone is looking at us...silently judging us because seriously....we sounded like the most effed up family ever with her screaming like that.

DH walks off with me and my mom to ride that coaster...leaving DH's dad and my youngest to watch over her.

We get off the coaster. DH IS FUMING.
She tells her dad how inconsiderate he is. How rude he is. How cold he is for "leaving" her there. He said, "No, you had a choice. You could've ridden."
She screams (and I mean SCREAMS) "I WAS GOING TO RIDE BUT YOU LEFT ME BECAYUSE OF HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!"

Yeah. OK. Whatever. *shrugs*

We then get tired of the fit (after ten effing minutes) and we all start to walk away to find a lemonade stand. SD16 (almost 17) follows us DEMANDING AN APOLOGY from ME for having ZERO RESPECT FOR HER AND HER FEELINGS.

I asked, "What lack of respect? Your dad works his ass off to take you to see Paul, and to take us here, you gave him crap all day...all of us tried to let you know that you weren't wrong for hating some of the rides....I just wanted your dad to ride ONE THING without hearing A LOAD OF BS first."

She then hissed, and I MEAN hissed, "Apologize to ME!"

I then, in all my infinite wisdom, told her to SUCK IT. And added, "You can suck it because you are not a baby anymore. I am no longer here to kiss your ass. I didn't make you what you are and I refuse to play INTO WHAT YOU'VE BECOME. Now put on your big girl panties and straighten out your SHIT or I'll straighten it out FOR YOU."

She was struck dumb.

I walked away. Her dad was almost in tears. My 14 year old was confused by her fit. AND SD DECIDED TO CLING ONTO MY OWN MOTHER FOR SUPPORT, EVEN TALING SHIT ABOUT ME TO HER.

My mom nodded for about 2 seconds and said, "hey little girl....you are so, so barking up the wrong tree. How about you climb off the cross and save the wood for those who need it."

(My mom NEVER says stuff like that)

SD16 then clings to my father in law. FIL says, "Uh, this makes me uncomfortable, but I do love you." (he is a doll, I mean seriously. Who handles this situation with that much love and yet....doesn't play into it?!)

FIL and SD16 ride together on our way back to Austin, while me, my 14 YO, DH, and mom ride back home in another car.

FIL confesses to me the next day...."SD16 says you are totally jeaouls of her and her dad. And it makes her sick when you kiss him."

ME: "?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"

Him, "Yeah. I've never seen y'all act inappropriate...but I think everything to her is innapropriate."

ME, "I am jealus of HER, THOUGH?"

He says, "She later said she was also jealous of you. In fact I think she is way, way more jealous of you. And she thinks it's gross that you are with her dad. And she claims that you would never dream of having sex unless every kid was out of the house."

OMG WTF? What could I even say to that?

So...I took a nap instead. I've been thinking ever since that'd be nice to just nap a lot more in the future. Wink

PS, my youngest started High School this week. *cries a bit*

Comments

Conflicted's picture

The direct result of being raised by an effed up bm I assume??

TheCharm's picture

I get really grossed out by examples of Electra complex.

KeeKee's picture

I'd be killing someone, but it wouldn't be myself. Your DH seriously needs a kick in the head for allowing that kind of crap to occur (let alone rewarding it). My SD18 is sly and manipulative but at least you can go out in public with her. I am so sorry.

JMC's picture

JamaicanMeCrazy
LIVE LOVE LAUGH

but thankfully on a little lower scale than your situation. My SD18 (then 16) tried to pull this crap on me at the ballpark while trying to impress her friends & little brother; like you, I finally had enough, pulled her aside and told her how it was going to be. Of course that started WWIII, but I refuse to this day to allow any kid to run me down and be disrespectful without calling them on it. You handled it just fine - I'm sorry that your other kids had to witness such a performance. I just can't believe a 16 yr old would have multiple meltdowns in such a public place and at an amusement park especially! That young lady is in for a rude awakening when real life smacks her in the face.

emptyrisksagain's picture

I can't waot for life...or anything...to smack her in the face. It won't be ME that does the smacking...but oh....I'd SO watch life doing it.

Yeah, I know I am mean and rude and bitter. *siiiiigh*

I'm sorry you went through this drama-school, too. *hugs* It sucks more than I can say. I wish it on NOW ONE (except BM and SD16).

MollyBee's picture

The behavior that your SD is exhibiting shows signs of serious mental issues. Has she even been seen by a professional who may be able to diagnose some of these things?

Now I am terrified of what my SD8 is going to turn into. After joining this site I have realized that my "drama" with BM and SD isn't going away anytime soon!

Next time you go somewhere with her and she acts like this, record it. Use your cell phone if you have to. Then, upload it on the computer to show her what she really looks like when she acts that way. If that doesn't help, show it to her friends and boyfriend. That'll straighten her out real quick!!

stepmasochist's picture

You should write this into a sitcom. I love how you handled it!

I agree with crayon though and we have similar problem with SD8

See FH told me that BM has this thing about throwing fits. screaming like a banshee, crying etc the whole works. Well, SD8 tries that crap too. You bump into her on accident and you'd think you just cut off her leg the way she can carry on. I mean she throws fits at the drop of a hat. Well, FH doesn't tolerate it or feed into it and neither does anyone else in his family. We all just tell her to knock that crap off or we'll give her something to really cry about. He tells her how she has to be more in control of herself. I think she's getting a little bit better about it. I hope so at least. If she pulls anything like that at six flags I'd have to boot her off the Texas Giant.

Freedom2005's picture

This is the exact behavior I am afraid of from my SD10 later in life. Right now she is not even hardly bratty. I don't complain about her behavior much other than normal kid stuff. Most of the stuff she does that I don't like, I realize is because of how BF treats her.

This is the exact scene I am wanting to avoid! I am really hoping that the counselor gets through to BF.

If not, I might be in for a REAL roller coaster ride!

Immature love says: 'I love you because I need you.' Mature love says 'I need you because I love you.'
Erich Fromm