Reading this over now, I want to laugh. I do have authority over the kids when they are here and it pisses her off soo much. DH did not reply, I really wanted to reply but haven't. Things are over now, but...say what...

A couple notes:
SD is supposed to be wearing her glasses when she's on the phone, and I had warned her that I would take them away if she didn't and then I followed through.
We were there at 8.15 and then left to put gas and returned in time to meet them before they reached to their door.
DH texted that THIS (meaning the situation) is fucked up and BM took it as if he said she was fucked up.

Stepmom31,

Let me tell you a few things. When I am discussing MY children with their father you need to mind your business. If I am not speaking to YOU then you DO NOT speak at me. First off, you were never woman enough to establish any decent relationship with me in regards to my children when you took their father. You took on a married man with two grown children whom you married once he was finally divorced. So if you feel you are owed anything or have any specific privilege you are VERY mistaken. I will not take shit from some immigrant who is here only by means of marriage.....which ironically came from ME marrying your husband in the first place!!!! My children did not choose you, you need to keep that in mind and have a little more sensitivity when it comes to them. Instead of being such a disciplinarian all the time maybe you could be a little more neutral. They were not in need of a mother when "DH's name" married you nor are they in need of a mother now. Play principal to the children you gave birth to and leave mine be.

DH's name!!!!
This is a damn shame I have to go through this. Be a man and tell your wife to stand back and let us be parents to OUR children. And really, please separate your wife from me when it concerns our kids. I am about sick of it. I don't want to be fighting with you, frankly I'd like to have a friendship with you for the betterment of our children. They are the ones that are from a broken family and they don't need added stress. You say "SD's name" is bad, "DH's name", we could have REALLY bad children. Not wearing her glasses makes her a BAD child? Give me a break!! What makes Stepmom31 a professional when it comes to kids? They only come there for two nights and sometimes it's every other week. They make decent grades, neither of them have ever been in any trouble in school or elsewhere. Every time I try to reach her on her phone I can't get through and it turns out Stepmom31 has taken her phone because of something or the other. I feel she has way more authority over my children than she should. I have respect for you and always will because you are my childrens father but she has to earn respect, she isn't just entitled to it. I want to have a GOOD relationship with you so our kids can be happy. She prevents this from happening and I am sick of pussy footing about it. The whole reason why you were even coming here tonight was because of your lack of responsibility to get the child support to me ON TIME, was it not?????. And I texted you that I would be there at 8:30pm, which I was in my parking space at 8:28 and you were NOT outside waiting like you texted SD that you were!!! So I do not deserve to deal with your aggravating text cussing me out and telling me I am fucked up!!! Was that necessary???? Honestly was it DH's name? Have we not been through enough to be better than this with one another? I am not going to pussy foot around for your wife. Do we need to go to court and go through mediation because I cannot discuss anything with my childrens father without your wife involving herself? And her even thinking she can open her mouth to me? Who the hell does she think she is? She did not make or raise my children!!! "BM's bf's name" is VERY upset I am dealing with any nonsense while I am 7 months pregnant with his child. He is not a disciplinarian to our kids, nor does he get involved and he feels you should not be texting me cursing at me however you feel like it because you feel you can. I provide both my kids a cell phone so that I may reach them when they are away from me, as their mother, that is MY RIGHT!! You telling me to call or text you? I have done so MANY times and your responses are delayed by hours and often even to the next day or never answered at all, so don't TELL me what to do. Her phone should be with her. If she has done something so bad that her phone should be taken away then you can call me to block it from my account because I can do that, but taking it from her so that even I can't get though is UNACCEPTABLE. They are so scared all the time that you are going to be mad with them and ground them etc if I come to you to speak out about anything, "DH's name", they shouldn't have to feel like that, you are their dad, they love you, they need to feel loved and that important to you that they come even before her. And any woman that would get in the way of that is NOT a woman. If pleasing your wife is more important than these children, then there is something wrong in your situation. You made them before you married her. She apparently has major issues with us having any kind relationship, this has been ongoing since you married her, and quite frankly I am over it....she needs to GROW up and let US handle OUR children. I have a man that I am incredibly in love with, whose child I am having, we are very happy, so my only reason for having any kind of relationship with you is to benefit our kids, they would love to see us be friends and have a great relationship, if we couldn't be a family together with them, then surely that is the least we owe them, don't you think??? And "BM's bf's name" is very supportive of that!!! He is by no means threatened by any relations I have with you!

I am really hoping that this email gives you some realization on the fact that I am trying to reach out to you as the father of my children, it is you and I that should be interacting regarding our children, working together for the common goal of raising good, happy children. If you want to let your wife's feelings or lack of confidence affect it then your childrens well being is not in your best interests.

If you want the kids for the weekend I will drop them off tomorrow night and since two drives is going so much out of your way then hell, I will pick them up Sunday too because you know what, they are my children and I love them. Let me know if you want them for the weekend, if not and you are upset and them like they feel you will be, then that is fine also.

For the record, is isn't you that they complain about so you shouldn't make them feel guilty or scared over ANYTHING. To you, I apologize if I came off harsh but I am not going to sit back and allow Stepmom31 to do as she pleases when it comes to our kids. If you had this same problem, I wonder how it would make you feel, but you don't, because my partner does not cause problems, he stays neutral.

"BM's sister's name",
Just copying you so that someone else has a copy of this email in case of anything, do not reply to it, just keep it. Thank you!

Regards,
BM