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Kids tell it all

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

So we found out how BM is paying for the house she and the kids live in..... She's not. 

We were driving and the kids saw a homeless person sleeping under the overpass. We explained he didn't have a home and the youngest started saying they were moving in with grandpa. He added that mom didn't pay for the house they are in. BM has already told SO she and the kids would be at grandpa's through summer which started us wondering.

Now I know that this isn't something the kids should understand and might be confused. Except wait? SO had multiple bills from the divorce where BM did this exact same thing in the past. What's even more upsetting is she just got a new 2018 car..... Guess the one she wrecked without insurance last year didn't look good enough anymore. 

What I hate is that she puts down my partner yet this is the 4th home the kids have left in two years. This one did last the longest but she moved in just last year with the guy she shacked up with after dating a like 3 weeks. He left less than 6 months later leaving her alone in the home which we thought from day one she couldn't afford alone 

My partner has moved twice. The first was out of his friends place where he ended up when she left him. That was into an apartment. Then he moved in with me which meant the kids actually got beds to sleep in when they are with us.

It just makes me mad. She sits there and plans a trip to Disneyland with the kids, is constantly partying, buys a new car, but doesn't pay her rent so now they will all be living with grandpa.... The kids already don't have beds when they stay the weekend and now they won't even have the couch.

Comments

Thumper's picture

Out of the mouths of babes....

Why would she burden them with this? POOR THINGS are going to think they are going to live on the street. 

Did she jump the lease? You just cant break a lease if she is renting. Is she renting? 

Pooooor kiddos.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

Her timing doesn't match for either a year or 6 months. Since it's a single family home in guessing minimum of a year's lease. This is all me guessing.

She's left places before without paying rent. SO is on the hook for half of all those old debts.

BM has never done well at not sharing adult info with the kids. I mean we will tell them we have bills but that they are adult responsibility to worry about. As kids there job is to go to school and behave.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

Those poor skids, growing up without much stability. 

Wait, did I just say Poor Skids???

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

Ha.... I hear you but thankfully I love my futures. My partner however is an amazing father and does a very good job in working with me to ensure I'm happy. 

Helps the kids are still little. I met the littlest when he was 3.

I was married once before and had alot of therapy during and after so I came into this with a tool box of skills to ensure I wasn't taken advantage of.

twoviewpoints's picture

isn't this one the one she moved into end of last May/first of June last summer? The guy up and moved out and she and the kids stayed in it. I vaguely recall something about you wondering what the kids would think when they returned after Dad's 6wks only to find yet another guy gone. 

I imagine lease on place came expired recently. The innocent and perhaps half understanding words of a child could mean anything. "Mom didn't pay " could easily mean 'Mom didn't buy aka own the house so we have to move'. 

Or maybe she just really didn't pay her rent. It may not have been a priority knowing she could go to grandpa's and leech off him. Either way, the kid's aren't homeless and this time she couldn't dump any debt she may have ran off from on your SO. 

The kids are use to being at their grandfather's home. They will be ok. 

I'm not sure why Dad should feel bad when she starts in on trying to put him down (unless she does it to the kids). As you said, the wonderful trip to Disney was Dad's saved CS right out of Dad's lockbox, I bet she got a fairly large tax return back too. Between child tax credit and probably earned income credit , she may have got anywhere from 5k to 8k. All this while it's Dad paying the CS and being a tax payer. 

 

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

They moved in during the winter and he left in May yes. Knowing her history theres a high chance she hasn't paid rent in months. I know it won't hurt my partner but sooner or later it will catch up to her. I am honestly worried if she will be able to find a new place without hooking up with a new guy because she's done this to so many other places.

My issue isn't them being with grandpa it's that now it's 4 adults and 2 kids in 3 bedrooms 1 bathroom. And more that she sat there saying all sorts of crap about the kids having to share a room when we have them. Yes she does say stuff to the kids.

Yes she did get alot of money and it looks like she's pretty much blowing it rather than being an adult like the kids need. I mean we picked up the kids with the 5 year old wearing 2T shorts last week and could hear her talking with a friend about going partying the next day in a city 3 hours away...... That's the stuff that's really starting to piss me off.

Yes they will be ok but they deserve better and yes  we're working hard to make that happen. 

hereiam's picture

I can't even remember how many times BM over her has moved over the years but it is A LOT. She is constantly getting evicted.

I can't imagine living like that, much less putting kids through it. In between evictions (and men) BM and her two kids would live with her mother and step dad. Fun for all!

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

It's not just the moving. It's that everytime they do it they lose things. Pets get left behind. Toys thrown away. She might put it all in storage but then she doesn't pay for the unit. That was a part of their divorce. She tried demanding he pay for her unit and then blamed him for losing everything she did.