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Cut out of family events if we are fighting, normal?

georgina29's picture

Submitted by georgina29 on Tue, 06/12/2018 - 11:20am

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Is it normal if you are fighting or had a recent argument or disagreement with your spouse that they automatically take back invites or inclusions to family events that you were previously included in? My husband does this whenever we are not getting along and then will automatically not include me in family events and get togethers. Btw it’s not as if I act out at these things, I always put on a good face and get along with everyone and not led on to the fact that we’ve recently had a disagreement. It’s almost like a punishment from him on his part to let me know that if I don’t agree with him on everything I’m automatically exiled and not included anymore.

ndc's picture

Submitted by ndc on Tue, 06/12/2018 - 11:40am

No, that's not normal.  My SO and I don't do that, and our parents didn't do that.  In fact, I don't know anyone who has dealt with that.  Frankly, most people I know don't want to broadcast their fights or disagreements to their families, because even after the fight is a distant memory to the couple, those family members hang onto it and it affects their opinion of the spouse/SO.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

Submitted by Dontfeedthetrolls on Tue, 06/12/2018 - 10:00pm

Unacceptable. Family events are serious things and I'd have MAJOR issues if my partner did this in an attempt to punish me. To me him doing this is showing you that you are not apart of his family. Its ok to have a disagreement but even when my partner and I are having one we put on our happy faces and go about normal around others because our issues are between us and shouldn't be hung out in front of others.