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Does anyone one to bet on how fast it takes SD to get kicked out...

Daisymazy2's picture

Submitted by Daisymazy2 on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 12:29pm

SD, age 16,  started a new group home yesterday.  This group home does not tolerate any violence/cursing/sexual behavior.  

Sd wasn't going to be released from the other group home because she had 2 to 3 violent episodes about a week before she was dismissed. BM convinced the social worker to release her for the new group home.  Keep in mind that  DH and BM believes that SD acted in violence because of the enviornment. The other kids in the group home were violent, not SD.  They state that SD is NOT a violent teen. SD has been suspended from school due to fighting at least once a month for the past 3 or 4 years.  She always starts these fights and of course, the teachers and students are ALL against her. She has hit and pushed BM.  She throws things when she is angry. 

The first group home would punish SD for fighting, cursing and her sexual behavior.  BM and DH thought the group home was just too harsh.  They really like this new group home. I am betting that SD is kicked out within 2 weeks. I would love to have SD stay at this group home for the 6 to 9 months that she is required but it will not happen due to SD's behavior. 

BM believes this place is going to SAVE SD.  I believe it is a little to late for that.  

 

Comments

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 12:35pm

Only SD can save herself. She has to want to be better/ do better. The problem is that she doesn't care. I think based on your other blogs 2 weeks might be too long!

Survivingstephell's picture

Submitted by Survivingstephell on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 12:38pm

What's the plan when she gets kicked out this time?  More denial?  Moving in with you???  

Daisymazy2's picture

Submitted by Daisymazy2 on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 12:47pm

She goes back to BM's house.  She isn't moving here.  I have already discussed it with DH.  My BS (not DH's) lives with me and I am not going to subject him to her sexual touches and for her to try to cry rape. I also work from home and I could get fired from my job if she starts cursing or throwing a tantrum.  I am on the phone 99.9% of the day.  If a client heard her, I would be fired.  We do need my job and I would not be able to find another job that pays as much.  

I am not willing to sacrifice my son or my job for an out-of-control teen.  Especially one with all the mental issues. 

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 12:59pm

days or less.  Talk about myopic parents!  Can't see right in front of them that they're craptacular parenting has caused all of this.  Yep it's a lot easier to blame everyone else then to figure out who is at every Trainwreck.

Daisymazy2's picture

Submitted by Daisymazy2 on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 9:58pm

BM went to court and the judge told her that SD had a Behavioral issue due to poor parenting. The judge didn't think SD needed any additional help.  He told BM to start parenting.  Now she is doing the group homes.

momjeans's picture

Submitted by momjeans on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 4:10pm

Nope, rules aren’t too harsh like BM and your DH wish to believe. Most, if not all, substance / behavioral rehabilitation facilities post these rules and expectations. 

Good for you for sticking to your guns. Here’s to hoping she doesn’t get the boot, because places like this have zero tolerance, understandably. 

ndc's picture

Submitted by ndc on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 6:43pm

Does she know that if she gets kicked out she's going back to BM's house?  If so, I'm going to say 2 hours.

Daisymazy2's picture

Submitted by Daisymazy2 on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 10:00pm

Yes, she knows she will go back to BM's.  DH has already told her that she can not live with us.  Of course, DH wouldn't tell SD it was because of her behavior.  He gave her some other lame excuse but at least he told her.

Daisymazy2's picture

Submitted by Daisymazy2 on Fri, 07/06/2018 - 10:04pm

She really doesn't have much of a choice.  No one else will take SD.  BM's family refuses to be around her.   Bm has full custody.  DH doesn't have any say in anything.  BM basically made sure of that many years ago when she had her lawyer draw up the paperwork and dh signed it.  I really have to laugh now.  BM thought she was screwing over DH when she had the CO done BUT she has screwed herself.  She did it to herself.