Example of typical idiotic male thought pattern
Ss5 had a meltdown last night...nothing major...dh asked him ti get the garbage can from the upper bathroom...ss said no thank you. Dh rephrased... Ss said no. Dh said you don't say no when i...blah blah song and dance... Then ss just did the crap he dies around his mom... Dh did really well handling it, i didn't step in.
Afterwards, ss is back to his normal self. Too much candy the night before and for lunxh, i figure, aling with a late night and lack of sleep....Halloween amd BM. Anyway...
After supper, I go see ss with a baggie of candy ans his eyes light up...i tell him tha although i told him that I'd give him a bag of candy, that because of the really crappy way he behaved before dinner, he wasn't going to be able to have some until tomorrow night. ( friday, tonight). He said ok secret, that was that.
This morning, half the bag is missing. Dh got into it. He also gave a small chocolate bar to ss.
I called him on it... He tried bullcacking his way out, saying he gave him chocolate from the bag our friend gave him...i told him it didn't matter.. He said yes but i didn't give him any from THAT bag... Again dh, that's not the point
Dh got a little pissy, saying he didn't see what the big deal was...it's just a small chocolate.
Point is, he threw a fit... I told him no candy til he gets home Friday night.. Dh agreed...dh still tries to say but it's not the same candy...
Dh...honey...dumbarse... Kid was told no candy.you gave him candy. He's 5. He couldn't give a flying fk whether it's candy from this bag or that bag... What he learns, is that he was told no candy because his behaviour, and you gave him some anyway.
Dh still kept on trying to justify...told him he could defend it as much as he likes... Still doesn't change the facts, which were that despite being told no candy, he got some... Meaning it doesn't matter if dad/secret punish me, dad will give the treat to me anyway...
Oh...
.. .yeah, oh... You KNOW this, dh. Knock it off.
Typical man logic.
Typical having to break it down to a first grade reading level.
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Comments
Big DH problem
Don’t blame SS, he’s a kid. Your problem is with DH, and his Disney parenting. Like it’s OK to go behind your back. Trying to justify his lack of parenting. Then blaming you. Then if or when this kid becomes a monster, it will not be his fault
That sounds more like stupid
That sounds more like stupid than man logic. Is he stupid?
No more than a man who treats
No more than a man who treats his daughter as a wife... Or a man who let his kids dictate his relationship... Definitely not the smartest thing to do, doesn't make them low intellect...
I meant man vs woman logic in
I meant man vs woman logic in the sense that for many men, each "thing" tends to be compartmentalized in its own bubble whereas typically "woman logic" ties it all in together in one big mobeus strip where the end meets the beginning.. Like as if the fact that the candy was from a different bag makes it ok, because "it's different", the way many men say no videogames doesn't mean no screen time ..
Trust me though, Iamwoman, dh didn't get a pass on it... He didn't get lectured, cuz I ain't his mama... But he understands where my boundaries are regarding being undermined, be it purposely or not.
Dh did take the candy away from ss, and talked to ss about having "forgotten" that ss had to wait until tonight. Ss was fine with it.
Harry it wasn't really "behind my back... That's kind if what I'm saying... That dh truly thought since the candy wasn't in the same bag, it didn't apply. He wasn't doing it to intentionally undermine me. Generally once he "gets it" he makes the link next time...