SD's Serious Knee Injury Update
I just wanted to post an update on the "serious" injury that I was sure would last up until my wedding day. Turns out the day that DH called her out on everything and she was "to distraught" to visit us the Physical Therapist took her off her remaining crutch.
I really thought she would pull something at the wedding but to my surprise she didn't and I was thankful for that. BM kept her home the week before the wedding b/c she was "sick" so she didn't exercise her time with DH. I really thought that would lead up to her being to sick the day of and not making it but I was wrong again. I don't mind being wrong in these cases. I'm just surprised.
Okay, so knee update - this is based on what DH reported to me. She had a physical therapy apt this past Wednesday. BM did her usual, I can take her and we can switch days stuff, I don't think she wanted DH to take SD to the apt. DH told BM that he wasn't switching days and wanted to go to the apt and would be talking to the physical therapist about the "injury". I am proud of him for actually sticking with it and not letting BM control everything again. Apparently SD was doing absolutely fine (which I already knew after seeing her run around the wedding and give my 4yo a shoulder ride - which I immediately told her to put him down since she was in therapy for her knee, lol) but as soon as she got into the office for the apt she started babying her knee and acting like it was bothering her. DH looked at her and told her to knock it off and she did her little innocent act like she didn't know what he was talking about so he told her he knew what she was up to and to stop favoring her knee when she was fine 5 seconds before they entered the building. I guess she still tried to play it off as she was just sitting with her leg fully extended "for comfort", lol! I'm glad that DH is FINALLY seeing it and FINALLY calling her out on it. Once they got into the apt he waited until she was doing some exercise and went and talked to the therapist. I guess he started with, "my ex wife will likely disagree but I believe my daughter is exaggerating this injury and is fine and really doesn't need PT anymore." The therapist agreed 100% and said the only issue he saw at this point was SD being out of shape from not being active and getting winded from the exercises but she really didn't need PT anymore. The therapist scheduled the next apt for a month out and told DH that she sees the dr next week and SHOULD be released and if so the apt for therapy could be cancelled b/c it wasn't really necessary. I guess when DH told BM that the date for the next apt she said it didn't make any sense for it to be that far out. DH then told her that it did make sense b/c her knee is fine and once the dr checks it she can cancel the other USELESS appointment.
DH is going to try to go to the dr apt as well. BM usually schedules this during times he can't. I guess that helps draw the injuries out for her. Anyways, should be interesting to see what she reports from the dr.
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I don't get these BMs. Is
I don't get these BMs. Is attention really worth the co-pay they must have for physical therapy?
BM is teaching SD some very unhealthy habits. It's good that DH is trying, but he'll just be labeled as the big meanie.
From this situation, I have
From this situation, I have gathered that BM wants to live through SD, which SD LOVED when she was younger (all that attention) but got tired of having to do things BM wanted (cheerleading) without giving up the attention.
So, fake an injury. SD gets told to be lazy, BM doesn't want to believe her daughter DOESN'T want to be Cheerleader Extraordinaire and would lie, AND BM doesn't want to risk SD actually being injured because she can't live vicariously through her anymore, and POOF! This situation.
SD wants to be lazy and BM won't allow it so long as she is healthy enough. This has nothing to do with DH; this all has to do with SD and BM trying to outsmart one another.
lieutenant_dad - I think you
lieutenant_dad - I think you have gathered the same thing that I have about the situation as well as BM likes the control aspect. Also, SD has learned to eat up the attention of injuries b/c BM does things like giving her a bell to ring when she is "sick" and waiting on her.
It is a hot mess and I am glad that DH is finally standing up to it but it has been going on for so long it will be hard to change these behaviors. Especially when one parent basically encourages it!
It isn't just co-pays, it is
It isn't just co-pays, it is MRIs and Xrays and every possible test to make it seem more severe than it is, EVERY TIME with this one! It is also control. Everything with this BM is about control. Also, she loves to tell us how much we owe her for medical. Luckily we aren't responsible for 1/2 but BM works at a school and must have amazing insurance or something. She tried to claim she was paying over $100 per PT visit. We told her to give us the itemized billing and we will pay our portion or have the dr contact us and she hasn't done that.
BM has taught her very unhealthy habits while also acting as MOTY and bashing DH. DH has already been labeled as the big meanie, that is why when he called SD out on the exaggerating of the injury prior to the apt she was "to distraught" to visit that day.
I'm going to start by telling
I'm going to start by telling you I saw the title, rolled my eyes and said OMG - just because this is so darn rediculous already!
Hopefully the PT gives the dr the heads up on sd "faking".
BM must really spoil the crap out of sd when she has an "injury".
LOL, it is definitely beyond
LOL, it is definitely beyond ridiculous at this point seeing as this "severe injury" happened at the beginning of NOVEMBER and is still ongoing!
I really hope the PT makes that note for the dr as well. I am sure the PT was glad to see a parent in there that wasn't feeding into SD's act.
BM does spoil her and treat her like royalty when she is "hurt/sick". The first time I witnessed the overly dramatic care she gives her was when she had a fever. I think she was maybe 7 at the time (early on in our relationship) and in the CO it states that BM gets SD if she is sick. At the time we lived a street over. BM sped over to our house, came in with a big blanket, wrapped her up in the blanket and carried her to the car. Even SD looked surprised by the production she made of it. She also gave her a bell to ring once when she was sick so she could cater to her every need.
Yet again, Simpleton, we have the same SD/BM
My SD13 has been complaining to her mother for months at this point--never to us, unless she was asked to do something she didn't want to--about transient joint pain. It's been everywhere in her body at this point (knees, hips, wrists, back, etc.). She's been to the PCP, to the Orthopedist, to a pediatric rheumatologist, and even to a neurologist to try to figre out what's wrong. (And by the time they got to the Neurologist, BM had decided she had migraines, as well). Every test comes out clean--because there's nothing wrong with the child.
Last weekend she came in rolling her eyes about how mom had taken her to *another* appointment and they had done Xrays and this, that and the other thing. I asked if she had been complaining of more pain. She said no. (I knew this was a lie because I had seen some of the messages between her and BM in which she was doing just that.) So then I asked her point blank if she was just wanting attention from BM, and having health issues is a great way to get her mother engaged. She started crying.
I itemized the money she had wasted trying to get her mother's attention. It was easily $5K in tests alone that insurance paid (she has GREAT insurance, fortunately). You should have seen her eyes.
I'm thoroughly disgusted by the whole thing. These women and their kids are so screwed up.
Wow, we definitely have the
Wow, we definitely have the same dynamic duo, lol! It is crazy. I am always amazed that BM still believes the complaints after so many tests that show nothing wrong. Or after months of therapy and it gets worse somehow and the test didn't show the "hidden/undetecable" injury....
We also had a talk with SD before this knee injury about the costs of all these dr apts and SD tried to claim she couldn't help that her mom took her to the dr for everything and we explained that she could by only telling BM if she is REALLY hurting/etc. The talk did no good b/c SD is also a liar. The only reason they multiple times came back with "it is worse than we thought" was b/c of SD's complaints and pretending she couldn't walk without crutches - you know loss of muscle function after a few weeks or however else she exaggerates it.
It is really disturbing!
Hey I realize I am late in
Hey I realize I am late in this post. I would like to ask a question.
Did BM file a law suit against someone or some business regarding this knee injury?
You know, that would make
You know, that would make more sense if she was trying to drag it out for that purpose but nope, I believe it is just another form of control for BM and also just part of being crazy!