funny MIL story
I'm pregnant and also have BD3 with DH. BD goes to daycare about 5 minutes away from our house and I also work right in the same area. My MIL lives about 40 minutes away (can be longer during rush hour because its off a commuter road).
Anyway, MIL asked me if she can watch the baby 1-2 days a week when I go back to work. Sooooo she wants me to drop BD off at daycare, drive at LEAST 40 minutes in the opposite direction with the baby, then turn around and go back where I just came from, then do it all over again when I'm done working?!?!
This lady is off her rocker!! She used to watch BD but we had nothing but drama and problems so I put her in daycare and have been extremely happy with it. It is planned for the baby to go to the same place BD goes.
I'm just amazed she thinks it makes any sense for me to do something like this in the morning, all before I even start working. She makes NO attempt to see BD, in fact she has only been to our house ONCE. If we want to see her, we have to go to her.
THEN she asked me if instead of bringing baby out on Christmas Eve (which isn't even something I'm remotely thinking about right now), if I wanted to have Christmas Eve at my house (she usually has it at her house). Like yeah, hosting Christmas Eve dinner for 10 people sounds much easier than bringing the baby out smh! What in the world! 
Eff her ideas for babysitting
Eff her ideas for babysitting and Christmas.
Seriously, how freaking selfish.
Tell me about it! I was like
Tell me about it! I was like is she freaking serious right now???
Seriously, adding almost 3
Seriously, adding almost 3 hours to your day... wtf is she even thinking. AND just having the baby in the car that much... what an awesomely caring grandmother.
The babysitting thing
is crazy because of distance and drama.
Christmas Eve? She may be hinting at her time as hostess coming to an end. I know my mom is about there so I have been the co-hostess for a few years now. Basically in my family you train to eventually be the host or hostess lol. We still hold it at her house but I function as the woman in charge. At least we have gotten past the point of the men sitting around and being served. DH and my brothers help as does my son. Just an idea as to why she is bringing it up now.
That could be. I don't think
That could be. I don't think I want to even get started hosting her family's holidays though. I'd rather go to their house so I am free to leave when they start annoying me haha. She has a daughter (SIL), I'm not sure why she hasn't asked her to do it (or maybe she has asked...). I'm already starting to host for my family (to give my mom a break) so that would just be too much I think.
This is a perfect scenario to lay down the facts
with a hint of sarcasm.
she asked to babysit bubs. Your answer is “NO, she is in daycare and has friends there and i’ve noticed a big difference in her milestones etc because she should be mixing with kids her age to advance her speech/language development” then you can add its just not practical driving for 1.5 hours to drop her off and pick her up from mil place
she asked you to cated family at xmas eve dinner at your home i assume in latter stages of pregnancy. Your answer is again “NO, incase you forgot i will be heavily pregnant, exhausted and busy getting stuff prepped for bubs birth. I do not need the stress and not to mention the crazy notion i cater for so many people for xmas and tidy up after as a heavily pregnant woman is just ridiculous”
heck when my son was 7 weeks old and his sister was 1.5 yrs old, my husband had his sister cater for a family gathering at our home without consulting me first. It was at a time when i am non stop breastfeeding my newborn and i was mad and not happy about it and hubby knew it... but my hubbe never even considered asking i cater for it as he knew i was breastfeeding 24/7
She's actually only asking to
She's actually only asking to watch the baby (who won't be born until end of October). So she wants me to drop my BD off at daycare 5 minutes away from my home and work, and drive 40+ minutes to bring her JUST the baby, then go back where I just came from, then do it all over again when I am done working LOL even worse than you thought, huh? She is something else.
As far as Christmas Eve, baby is due end of October AND I'm having a c section so the chances of me hosting a dinner for 10 people 6ish weeks after surgery while having a newborn and a 3 year old are... slim to none haha - again, she's off her rocker!
My DH already told her no to the babysitting idea. It's not even logical for me to do something like that. If she wants to see the baby, she can come visit and see BOTH of the kids, not just the baby.
That IS funny. I laughed at
That IS funny. I laughed at how delusional your MIL is. What did DH think of his mom's suggestions?
Unfortunately, my DH has trouble standing up to his pushy mother, so in your situation we'd probably end up hosting Christmas Eve, but even pushover DH would laugh at the ridiculous babysitting suggestion. Thank God my MIL lives a thousand miles away!
Half the time I don't even
Half the time I don't even know if she is joking or being serious because the things she says are so far out there haha!
DH told her no to the babysitting idea. I don't have time to do all that running around in the morning before work, and leaves for work around 4am so him taking the baby isn't an option.
As far as Christmas Eve, ugh luckily it's like 7 months away so I have time to come up with something. I can't believe she's even thinking about that right now.
So, MIL makes no effort with
So, MIL makes no effort with your eldest yet wants the baby? Ummmm just no.
Stick to your current plan. If MIL wants to have a relationship with your children, she needs to make the effort. An occassional visit to her place is one thing, and is reasonable. Driving an 80 minute per day round trip so she can favor the baby over your eldest is toxic. That she even suggested it makes my skin crawl.
Interestingly, my SIL's MIL does this same thing though in reverse. She insists on watching my SIL's eldest but refuses to watch the youngest. She has that kid (our nephew) so F-d up that he is virtually a shut in. He won't do anything adventurous which IMHO is completely out of character for a pre-teen boy. He is so pathetic that I just leave him standing and waiting when he is with me if he won't participate. I have left him at the foot of hiking trails because "I could slip and hurt my ankle" I have left him at the base of large rocks while I climbed up to see the view from the top, I have left him standing on the beach hundreds of yards from where I was boogie boarding because "a wave could get me or a shark could bite me". It got so pathetic that I would point out that the tree he was sitting at the base of while waiting for me could fall on him. That freaked him out.
I am not one to serve a child up to an IL for them to F the kid up. My SIL knows her MIL has F'd her son up but "we can't afford day care for both kids."
smh
Wow! I am all for screwing
Wow! I am all for screwing the kids up as little as possible, even if that means not being around certain family members!
My MIL says she wants to watch them when they are babies but only until they get to the "terrible twos." Whatever. If she isn't going to spend time with my BD, she won't be spending time with the baby either. It's just not right. Not to mention the driving around in the morning just is NOT going to happen no matter what. They will both go to the same daycare that is 5 minutes from my house and my job. She makes absolutely no sense.
Yes add hours to your day
Yes add hours to your day driving around, get home later, make a baby drive in a car 3 hours a day and spend a fortune on gas just so she can “watch” the baby. The daycare is prob cheaper than the gas as well, Lol.
“Thank you so much for the offer but I just can’t afford to lose 3 hours of my day driving so they will be going to daycare together right by our house and close to my work, but I really appreciate the offer”.
It is comical! I was
It is comical! I was completely shocked when she asked because I don’t think anyone in their right mind would expect someone to do this. It’s definitely a no!