This really sounds like a terrible idea.  Neither of you have good job prospects, you will likely take pay cuts, bills will be higher, and I am guessing that you are going to get stuck with a hefty transfer tax bill when the deed is transfered.  The other child is perfectly OK with this gift to their sibling or is this going to start a major sh*tstorm of inheritance crazy?  And if you are looking at custody issues on top of this, I can't even imagine.

Why is she not just selling the house?  Why drag you all into this?  You are talking about a serious upheaval of your life here.  Be really really sure of what you are doing.  I would be scared to death.

If you haven't owned a house before, be sure to factor in upkeep. You'd be surprised how much you spend, even when you think the house is in good condition.  If your SO is handy, that can help. 

ETA: Not to be sexist, perhaps you are handy yourself. 

Isn't this what you've been working toward and hoping for?  To move closer to the skids and be a bigger part of their lives?  Is your worry because he hasn't taken care of the VA disability and it's going to be a financial stretch?

Have you done the math?  Are the property taxes, insurance, utilities and upkeep on the house more than your current rent?  If not, is the difference more than the amount of your pay cuts?  I would line up the income and expenses and determine if you can make it work.  Since this has been a goal for awhile, I'm assuming you've already done the math and know if you can make this work.  If you can't, your SO should be the brakes on the transfer of title to the house.

DH and his mother need to see a lawyer to transfer the house. The house can be transferred without triggering gift taxes if it is done correctly. There are ways to do it.

One way is to get an official appraisal (by a licensed appraiser not a real estate agent). The lawyer then uses the appraisal to file the IRS forms that acknowledge that the value of the house is included in mom's estate at the time of her death. 

It's not hard to do it right. You do need a lawyer and he will cost, but it's usually very reasonable. Do it wrong and you may find problems down the road.

What a terrible idea.

How are you gong to afford taxes? It’s very expensive. Water? Other bills. I know you won’t have rent but your rent is cheap.

You previously said that you’d only move if SO gets VA money but it’s not even in the works yet. It’s often a disaster for low income people to assume ownership for a house but you plan on taking pay cuts? He already makes next to nothing. How much can you cut? You already can’t afford things like buying a car and having to share a car and SO can’t even afford doctor appt which isn’t even that much. How much can you two cut and still function? I see foreclosure in the future. 

What about SOs sibling? What do they think of the house going to SO? Why is this woman giving SO owndershuo of the house? Is it gift? Or is she selling to him? 

Why not wait when and if you two either make more money or get VA money to become homeowners. You need to be in a much better shape. Plus you aren’t married. Are you planning to contribute to upkeep of this house that isn’t yours? And you’ll get nothing out of it? You give up your job and take a pay cut so you can live in the house belonging to a boyfriend who can’t maintain said house on his own. Why on the planet?  It’s a bad financial decision on your part. 

Have you personally talked to VSO when they at least vaguely have an idea how long it takes for a senator to locate military records? At least general idea? A week or a month or another year? 

Assuming ownership and moving to that house now is a horrible horrible idea 

Why would you want to sacrifice your career and quality of life for a house you have no claim to? Someone giving your boyfriend a house doesn't mean you should have to make all these concessions and take all these risks. I thought you were focused on repairing your finances?

I know it sounds like a dream: a whole house, for free! To go from renting to home ownership!! But just because you can doesn't mean you should, because home ownership is very, very expensive. If you're barely making ends meet now, how does it make sense to take this on? Especially since there's likely to be a lot of deferred maintenance. Do you have 8k for a new HVAC system? 2k to repair dry rot? 6k for a new roof? Heck, where I live, even if you're doing the work yourself, any job costing $500 or more requires a permit - which costs more money.

You know those glamorous home giveaways we see on tv or in raffle solicitations? Many of the "winners" never actually live in them, because they can't afford the property taxes and associated costs. They "win", and then have to sell the house to pay the IRS.

I really question the judgement of this man you've chosen, OP. You simply can't rely on him to make good decisions.

New kitchen, new bathrooms,  and will not be able to sell it. Lots of people sell there home and buy a small retirement home.  Using the exter cash fro, home sale for living on .

Is your SO expects you to contribute to the house that can never ever be yours? If something happens to him you’ll be on the street and get no money back for what you put in. No one in their normal state of mind  will ask a boyfriend or a girlfriend to do such a thing. What’s he thinking? I’d only move in with him if he was well off and able to maintain the house without my contribution. Are you going to be officially a renter? If not what’s your rights here? None? That’s not smart. Don’t do that. 

I know your answer is “but I love him and the kids”. But you aren’t 16. You have to be smart and not build your whole life only on the fact that you are in love. Don’t make dumb moves. 

OK.  I am going to say the thing that no one really wants to say.  This may be a good thing for your SO.  It may not.  Who knows.  But you do realize that it has no upside for you, right?  You have ZERO legal claim to anything about it.  You are sacrificing a lot and are going to be putting money into this house and it is HIS.  If he is willing to put you on as joint tenants with right of survivorship or get married and have it be tenants by the entireties then that is one thing.  But you just moving with him and living there by his good graces is nothing short of financial insanity.  You are making a major commitment here.  Time for him to put up or shut up.

You just very recently said you work overtime to save to buy SO a car, prior to that you asked about driving Uber. Now you are saying you bought a car months ago. Not sure why you asked how to buy him a car if you already did.

Trust me if you only have 300 left after paying bills you shouldn’t become homeowners because if you think nothing will break in the house or there’ll be no extra expenses, you are wrong. You’d not be able to afford it, you two need to be in a better shape to own the house 

The difference between renting an apartment and living in the house is that living in the house is much much more expensive unless of course you rent luxury apartment,  which you don’t.

Not only it would cost you more it would be much more physical work and housework than apartment as you need to maintain outside and inside. Plus you said your boyfriend has no use of 1/4 of his body and walks with a cane so ton of job will be on you.

In addition when you are on a lease you have official residency in the state. When you have no lease and no ownership, you have no official residency and you actually officially considered homeless. If you aren’t on any lease or deed etc and simply live in someone’s house, you don’t have residency and are homeless (at least that’s how it’s in my state). There are renters and there are owners, you’ll be neither 

So when you say renting is the same as living in someone else’s house, it’s not. Neither financially nor physically nor in terms of your rights nor your status. 

Don’t be naive. Yes wanting to be with a man is valid enough reason but it doesn’t mean you need to make naive choices. If everyone here thinks it’s silly so do people in real life. Go see a lawyer. Ask how wise is it 

Well, you've gotten a lot of advice.

I'd crunch some numbers in terms of taxes (not every area has high property taxes, some are quite low, actually), upkeep and insurance. 

I too would be bothered by the idea that you get nothing out of the house in the end - even if you end up married, if you both need to go into assisted living in 60 years, you won't have the income from your house to help support you (I know no one thinks about getting old and decrepit in their 20s, but hey, it happens faster than you think) - you'll have to turn it over to (fill in the blank).  The kids might not want it, they may move far away.

I get the sentimentality of a family home (I was very sad when my parents sold the home they owned for 47 years), but financially, it makes no sense.

This would all make better sense if you didn't have to take a pay cut to live there.

I kind of agree that what kind of houses cost 30k and 50k and they want to keep these houses in the families? Is it a trailer? Or is it a total fixer upper? Would these kind of houses even survive to be passed down to next generations? I’d certainly not move there until it’s properly appraised and evaluated. Dang... 

Honestly if houses are that dirt cheap by you, I’d wait when you two are married and hopefully have VA money or better salary or maybe not even need that and just buy a house together that you both own. If houses are that affordable I’d not go live in someone else’s houses with no rights but wait a bit longer and buy my own so whatever I contribute would be towards my own home.  I had no idea it’s so inexpensive

again nothing to do with investment but why live in other peoples houses if you can live in your own . 

I get the emotional attachment to a family home. But I bet sooner or later nobody in the family will want it. Then it will either have to be sold or left to crumble. And whomever sells it will be a schmuck. And walk away with the cash. 

I wouldn’t touch it, but that’s me. And I will need the equity from my beautiful house when I move to the old folks’ home. That’s closer every day.