Yep. We switch on Mondays and I've come to realize that's a huge mistake because every other weekend is with her and the weekend without her is dreading that shes coming back. I really really hate the every other week because its such a long time with her there but yet not enough time to really enjoy without her.

I think for me a large part of the anxiety is that I dont know which personality she'll be showing up with or what new crap the week will bring.

OMG yes. I feel the exact same way. I am a completely different person when it's a skid free weekend/day. I also leave work feeling like I could vomit and dread going home.....I usually put the baby to bed at 7 and then I just go to bed b/c I can't deal with it either. It is non stop whiny talking and always asking DH to buy them something, make them something, get them something. The 12 year olds presence makes me questions my sanity.....she literally just stalks DH....as Ive said before.

She stands outside the bathroom door almost with her nose touching the door when he is in the bathroom. She follows him to the garage, the laundry room, outside.......if he cooks...she sits in the kitchen starting at and talking to him without a break. If he leaves the kitchen to sit on the couch....she follows and sits on his lap. Thank the good lord that this kid does  NOT spend the night.....so I quietly count down until 830 pm when she goes to back HOME to BM.

But I pull into my driveway on those dreadful days...mutter I hate my life before I step out of my car....paint on a smile and walk inside my home. I say as little as possible.........when skids are there.....who could get a word in anyway?

We only have SSs EOWE and without fail, I get in a fight with DH on the Thursday before they arrive. I think it's because I'm feeling so anxious already at the prospect of their arrival. They aren't terrible kids, but they are loud, they destroy things, they are entitled, and they are constantly "tattling" to BM who is constantly sending angry messages about "they don't like this", "how dare you do that", "they don't want to be with you", etc. She creates such a toxic environment and she's never even set foot in my home. They are teenagers, so this behavior is not age appropriate. 

I've also discovered that I get in fights with DH on the Sunday of the weekend they are not with us, because I know that the next time I have a weekend, it will be misery. 

I completely understand!! We now have 2 weeks on and 2 weeks off with SD17. The 2 weeks we don't have her I'm happy but then once we start getting halfway through that 2nd week I feel my mood changing and the anxiety brewing knowing she'll be back for another long 2 weeks. Other than being generally a negative whiney person she doesn't really do anything to me (not anymore).. it's just her presence. Not much advice I can give as I never really got better at handling it! I just try to find my happy place mentally and leave the room if she starts up on something that annoys me. It's definitely not fun though and I feel for you!!

I remember those days. He would have his kids every Tuesday and Thursday and EOW. I hated going home. I would find things to do like volunteer to work weekends on the days I knew they'd be coming over. I felt like an awful person because of it. I'm not in that situation anymore, thank god