Need to vent
Forums:
My SD is 20 and still comes to our house every Sunday. My husband works 6 days a week which leaves no time for us. I have brought this up before with him and it goes nowhere. She does not go to school or work. Help! How can I bring this back up to him without sounding like a horrible person.
When she was in school he had her every other weekend which worked out good for us. We have been married for almost 4 years.
First of all, you are worried
First of all, you are worried about being a bad person. This means you are questioning the right you have as DH's wife to spend time with him alone. Put it out there as a need - not a want.
Suggest they meet for lunch
Suggest they meet for lunch during the week so you have time alone together on Sundays.
Telling your husband that you
Telling your husband that you want to spend time with him alone shouldn't make you a "horrible person". Shouldn't he be happy that you want that?
Time for regular visitation to stop. My SS20 comes over (by invitation) maybe once a month, for a meal, and then goes back to BM's. At least suggest it be biweekly.
I agree that telling your DH
I agree that telling your DH that you want some alone time with him doesn't make you sound like a horrible person, it makes you sound like a loving wife! I would be suggesting to him that she comes once a fortnight or even once a month so you two can have some time together as well.
Having her come over every Sunday
Makes him selfish. That something else to vent about
SD needs to get in gear.
Your DH should be sitting SD down and finding out why the hell she isn't working or in school. (I am assuming she does not have a valid reason.)
I agree that once or twice a month is plenty but your DH may not want to be that restrictive. It is his darling daughter, after all, and he probably enjoys his time with her - that's why your conversations about this have gone nowhere.
He probably figures he "sees" you six days a week alone so why not have SD over every Sunday? It's not right, but that's probably what his train of thought is.