What should I do?!?!?
I'm a mom of 3 pretty good kids. 12 year old boy, 10 year old girl, and a 1 year old girl. I work full time and my job is physically demanding. I also work on average 100 hours every 2 weeks. So here's the kicker. I have this boyfriend who has 2 kids. A 2 year old girl and 4 year old boy. He doesn't work so he lives with me. His kids are let's say difficult. When I say my kids are good they have attitudes like any normal preteen but they know when I mean business. His children don't listen, whine and cry to get their way, are wasteful, and are very rude and disrespectful. My own children have even said, "there's no way we would get away with acting like that!" And they are right. These kids mom is locked up and the dad just basically gives into them. Well a couple weeks ago I had enough honestly I feel like his kids are causing a rift in our relationship because my kids don't feel like they have a home with me and I feel used and pushed around. So I finally told him you have 30 days to get a job and step up as a parent but I feel like it's going no where and I feel like I just want them gone but I don't know if I'm just overwhelmed and have to high of expectations.
I let him move in cuz I have
I let him move in cuz I have been in love with this man for 3 years but honestly I don't think love is enough. And where we live there are jobs in high demand that are hiring but I just don't think he will apply even my father tried to get him a job.
If could have a job, but
If he could have a job, but refuses... he is using you.
Your own children are getting less so you can support this loser and his 2 kids.
Yikes.
So, let me see if I
So, let me see if I understand. You let a deadbeat move in with you, you support him, his kids and your three without help from him. He refuses to take a job though there are high demand jobs that he could work immediately... and... you love him soooooo much that none of this made an impression on you before he and his spawn moved in?
Really?
What, exactly, have you been in love with for the past three years?
At least you are gaining clarity. Time for this failed man, breeder and parent and his prior relationship spawn to move out and for you to raise your standards on the quality of man you will accept as your equity life partner and expose your own children to.
Never forget the lesson that this POS has taught you.
LOVE---Love has a paying job
LOVE---Love has a paying job AND takes care of his kids
He sounds like mooch.
So sorry.
.
He doesn't work so he lives
He doesn't work so he lives with me.
This is exactly why he would NOT be living with me.
Why does he not work? Where was he living before he started sponging off of you? You've been in love with him for 3 years but he has a two year old?
Evict him.
Everything she said. You are
Everything she said. You are being used.
Give them the boot.
Well for a start he got two kids to a women who in jail no job and more than happy to move in with his working girlfriend who had experience looking after kids. Seeing any red flag here???? Boot them out and if your kids arent happy with them being there either boot him and his kids out even more. Look after your own family first.
I can some what relate
I can somewhat relate because I do with my so for 3 years and he has a 5 year old daughter and we have the two year old son and a one-year-old son together. His daughter was raised by her great aunt so she was always treated like a baby and didn't have any kind of discipline and pretty much ran the adults that she was around. I am pretty strick but I also treat all the kids the same way . She is always picking on her little brother, teasing him w things and hitting him. When i ask her what happened she always tells me she doesn't know she didn't do it it was all brother fault she always does every thing tell l her not to do. My so doesn't say anything to her about it he never disciplines her. She is never in the wrong whatever she ask for from him she gets. To top things off. His family they play favoritism they always want to take her for the weekend or watch her when we need somebody to watch the kids they always buy her stuff they always give her stuff in front of my two year old. When it comes to his family they don't have anything to do with my two boys and they never want to watch them or keep the for a 2eekend they always give SD things in front of my 2 yr old when they Kno that we are always fair w both of the kids there excuse is that they can't handle little ones or hold them my family doesn't treat her any different and is always willing to help out w all three of them. My so and I both work full time jobs but my so never helps out w any of the kids
Apparently the OP was not
Apparently the OP was not interested in what anyone has had to say about her situation. Hopefully she has pulled the plug on this POS and his prior relationship spawn and is focusing on living her own life and on what is best for her own kids. Which is obviously not having her POS BF and his family in their lives.
When she finds her confidence she will be in a far better position to have quality people in her own life and the lives of her children.