Thoughts on SS’s bizarre behavior regarding my Bday
So every year DH either takes SS13 shopping for a bday card for me OR has SS make me one. I do the same for DH.
So DH try's and takes SS to buy me a card and SS says he wants to make one...ok fine. When my birthday comes and SS says he has not finished it yet. Ok fine bring it over next time( he's making it at BMs) Well next time comes and SS said he "forgot it" at BMs. Ok fine. NEXT SS comes over he tells DH he "lost" it and can't find it. At this point DH is getting Irritated and when he tells this to SS, SS gets pissy with DH.
So it's Quite clear SS has been lying about making a card and just keeps making excuses. DH tried to get him to make one at our house but again SS got pissy.
Honestly I could care less if the little monster gives me a card or not but I'm just Curious why SS is lying about making one when clearly he is not.
My theory would be that he
My theory would be that he was caught by BM making you a card.. and BM threw a fit and destroyed it. He doesn't want to admit his mom was a witch... and he is afraid of making her angry.. and he can't double back now and ask dad to help him get a card.. it's all after the fact and he would have to admit why the card did not get made.
Perhaps SS doesn't want to
Perhaps SS doesn't want to give you a card, but doesn't want to come out and admit that to DH (who clearly doesn't want to hear it), so he lies. I'm not sure why your DH is so keen on him giving you a card anyway - IMO how the skids treat you every other day of the year is much more important than how (or if) they recognize your birthday. A 13 year old who gave a fig wouldn't need to be nagged - your DH is making things worse.
My guess
I'm guessing he is 13. You are a peripheral person in his dumb, ealy teen life, and he doesnt realize his card or it's absence would have any significance to you.
A skid who treats you like crap and then gives a bday
card, its like a slap in the face
SAY IT!!!!!!
The beating around the bush, telling people what the liar thinks they want to hear crap drives me nuckin futz!!!!!
I quit tolerating it with SS when he was at that phase and just sat him down put the proverbial interrogation lamp on him and started pulling teeth for hours on end until he finally just told the truth. Then we would have extensive discussion on how it was so much easier to just tell the truth rather than trying to avoid hurting peoples feelings by telling them what he thought they wanted to hear.
Eventually he figured it out. Now 15-20 years later, he just cuts to the chase and gets to the point and truth. He learned that lying got him in far more trouble than anything he had done that he felt he had to lie about.
We had many laughs along the lines of "Really? That is what you thought you had to lie about. Pretty dumb kid, pretty dumb."
I have had exactly the same
I have had exactly the same experience in the past. One of the SDs has said numerous times (usually to DH not me) that she has something for my birthday at NPD BM's place, and will bring it over, but then "forgets" and whatever it is never materialises. This has happened more than a handful of times - the SD is just lying which they both do as easy as breathing.
What I suspect about your SS is that he doesn't want to give you a card and this rigmarole enables him to get out of it without losing too much face with his Dad.