A few months ago you  were very helpful in confirming that I needed to walk away from SD, her husband and even back away from the grandgirls. Well Christmas went ok with little contact and things with my DH have really been a bunch better since I told him I no longer wanted to be involved with SD nonsense and drama.  But then here comes New Year's and a planned visit from our granddaughter who would be passing through with her step father (SD's Husband) while driving her car back to military base in CA.  Keep in mind that this was a planned event.  Everyone knew except SD which I find unrealistic because this planned trip was talked about since granddaughter enrolled into the Army last June..  SD had to know.  In short, SD threw a fit when it came time for them to get ready and leave.  She refused to allow her husband to purchase a return airline ticket (which makes no sense because it should have already been purchased) and forbid him to go.  He is 48 yrs old. She is 38. Now keep in mind granddaughter counted on her step dad to chart the trip with stops/sightseeing.  She was left to drive by herself and of course her first stop (10 hrs away) is as it alway was going to be to stop and see us.  My DH was beyond angry as granddaughter is only 20 and has only driven for about a year, mostly locally.  Her safety was the issue.  She got to us safely.  In the meantime, my husband asked me to see what a car transport would cost.  I had accidently found a program that offers service folks transport for their vehicles for free.  This came about by nothing short of a God Wink as I contacted a helpful local transport company office.  When granddaughter got to us, the rest of what happened with SD and her husband unfolded.  It was a heap of ridiculousness.  We presented what info we found about the free transport and granddaughter decided to take us up on the plane ticket back to California Base and making arrangements with the free transport for the car. She advised SD who told her she had 1 month to get her own car insurance and followed up with "Make this quick! I don't really care what you have to tell me."  Grand advised SD's husband who said he was glad we found the transport but offered no assistance as he had to keep his head down to avoid more issues with SD.  We have heard nothing from either SD or her husband.  Grand's car is in my garage, she is safely back at base and I got my husband to calm down because anything he says will just cause more issue for granddaughter and possibly in the future for the other 2 grands.  

I am not unhappy that we helped granddaughter. After all that was the right thing to do and I am so grateful for the help from the car transporter who told me about the free program.  The whole thing has left me feeling exhausted and once again frustrated. I can't believe that I was able to look at this logically even though it would have made me so happy to see my husband explode at my SD and her husband.  I just couldn't let that happen because at the end of the day those 3 granddaughters are the victims and what kind of person (grandparent) wouldn't want to be there and help if able.  However, this has brought back much of my own mental anguish regarding SD. My DH has been very thankful to me and that helps but I really have gone back to having mind consuming thoughts about these ridiculous SD episodes.  Any advice how I can get back on track faster.  I would so appreciate some words of wisdom and strength from people who can understand my position..  Thank you.